Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 29 Kislev, 5784
Parsha Mikketz (Genesis 41:1 -44:17)
Third Portion: Genesis 41:39 – 41:52
Good morning! On this fifth day of Hanukkah we are shifting from one moon cycle to another. This is a major energetic shift as we leave Kislev and move to Tevet. Today is December 12th on our calendars here in America. 12/12. Tonight is the new moon. Thursday night is the last night of Hanukkah. Friday night is the first Shabbat of Tevet. That is a lot of energy shifting at the same time. We are in for an exciting week, I’d think!
Through it all – what grounds us, is the idea that the work we are doing since the new year – Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur – that we began to see fruit in Sukkot for – all of this work is being put into practice during Hanukkah to reveal to us both reward for the work we are doing AND lighting up the work we still need to do.
And. I use the word “work” here very loosely. Because there is no work. We are called to just be. Be in a moment. But Hashem is revealing to us the letting go of our past in order to be in a moment. He is revealing the letting go of a future to be in a moment.
I read a quote this morning in my meditation app, 10% Happier that has been sitting with me all morning. It was this:
“Forgiveness is not about excusing someone’s behavior. It is about letting go of resentment.”
This is the “work” – releasing. Our body will respond. Because it holds this energy within. Resentment is significant – and the body retains it like a cancer.
Ok. With this, let’s dig in. The context here is Joseph has interpreted Pharoah’s dreams. He has given Pharoah direction. Let’s see how Pharaoh responds:
39Then Pharaoh said to Joseph, “Since God has let you know all this, there is no one as understanding and wise as you.
40You shall be [appointed] over my household, and through your command all my people shall be nourished; only [with] the throne will I be greater than you.”
41So Pharaoh said to Joseph, “Look, I have appointed you over the entire land of Egypt.”
42And Pharaoh removed his ring from his hand and placed it on Joseph’s hand, and he attired him [with] raiment of fine linen, and he placed the golden chain around his neck.
43And he had him ride in his chariot of second rank, and they called out before him, “[This is] the king’s patron,” appointing him over the entire land of Egypt.
44And Pharaoh said to Joseph, “I am Pharaoh, and besides you, no one may lift his hand or his foot in the entire land of Egypt.”
45And Pharaoh named Joseph Zaphenath Pa’neach, and he gave him Asenath the daughter of Poti phera, the governor of On, for a wife, and Joseph went forth over the land of Egypt.
46And Joseph was thirty years old when he stood before Pharaoh the king of Egypt, and Joseph went out from before Pharaoh and passed through the entire land of Egypt.
Pharoah takes this prisoner and IMMEDIATELY makes him leader over Egypt. Consider this. How quickly things shifted for Joseph. He interpreted Pharoah’s dream and was given EVERYTHING.
I wrote this two years ago, and I felt it was important to highlight:
Pharaoh named Joseph “Zaphenath-paneah.” Which means “Explainer of Hidden things.”
Then. In what seems like a bit of Irony; Pharoah gives Joseph Potiphar’s daughter Asenath for a wife. Take THAT Potiphar’s wife!
I reflect on people in my life who “explain hidden things” to me. Early on, I resisted this idea. I would sometimes get angry when someone shared with me something they saw within me, that I didn’t see within myself.
How do we respond today when someone shares feedback with us that we don’t see?
Those of you who know me – know I love the Johari window. It basically looks at the “self” in two dimensions – our knowledge of ourselves and others’ knowledge of us. You can dig more here. But the short version is this:
There are four quadrants:
- Things we know about ourselves that others know about us – our Open areas
- Things we know about ourselves that others DON’T know about us – our Hidden areas
- Things we DON’T know about ourselves that others know about us – The Johari window calls these “blind spots” but I prefer to not use the ableist language of that and like to use the term “Obstructed areas”
- Things we DON’T know about ourselves that others DON’T know about us – our unexplored areas
Pharoah recognized the value of Joseph. Joseph revealed hidden things – not just in dreams – but within Pharoah.
In leadership – great leaders know the value of this third area. People in our lives who are willing to share feedback with us we may not realize about ourselves. AND. If we are not ready to hear it? They can be SCARY. We may not be ready to receive the feedback.
But this is where the rubber meets the road. How we handle feedback.
So – how do we navigate feedback we receive that seems to not align with what we believe about ourselves? Here are some reflective questions:
- How much time I have spent within myself to know whether this feedback is correct or not?
- How is my body physically reacting to the feedback? Am I going into fight/flight responses? Why? If it is just feedback, and it’s isn’t accurate, why am I having a physical reaction to it?
- I will often share this; “If someone criticized you for being a head of lettuce, would you react? Of course not. You’d think they were joking. Because you absolutely know you are not a head of lettuce because you’ve lived the human experience. However, if someone pointed out you seem to be feeling inadequate and you hadn’t considered that before? You’d be more afraid they were right so you’d get defensive and have to prove you weren’t feeling that way.”
The bottom line is to remain curious. Pharaoh was curious. Joseph shared. Pharoah could see Joseph was right. He revealed hidden things. That’s my takeaway.
And Joseph went and explored the places he was given to lead. Let’s keep going:
47And in the seven years of plenty, [the inhabitants of] the land gathered [food] by handfuls.
48And he collected all the food of the seven years that was in the land of Egypt, and he placed food in the cities, the food of the field surrounding the city, he put within it.
49And Joseph gathered grain like the sand of the sea, in great abundance, until [one] stopped counting, because there was no number.
I am guessing Joseph went through out Egypt to explain to the people the mission and purpose of what they were about to embark on. He had to listen and get buy in. And the people followed.
We close today’s portion focusing on Joseph’s children:
50And to Joseph were born two sons before the year of the famine set in, whom Asenath the daughter of Potipher, the governor of On, bore to him.
51And Joseph named the firstborn Manasseh, for “God has caused me to forget all my toil and all my father’s house.”
52And the second one he named Ephraim, for “God has made me fruitful in the land of my affliction.”
What is FASCINATING to me about this? Joseph’s name is not listed as a “tribe of Israel.” His two sons are – they are the “half-tribes.” And – enshrined in our lineage is toil and affliction.
My takeaway? We are sometimes called to reveal hidden things. And. This will bring toil and affliction. And. We will be given gifts (like children) who will cause us to forget the toil and provide fruit in the affliction.
Those are my thoughts. What are yours?
Here is my commentary from the past two years:
Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 26 Kislev, 5783
This morning I’ve been reflecting on Joseph’s dream interpretation work. And how that has brought him to this place of leadership. Each time Joseph has risen and gained power, it has not worked for him. With his brothers, his power brought him to a place of being thrown into a pit with a scorpion.
Then he went to Egypt where he was sold to slavery – but then worked up as a leader in Potiphar’s house. He rose and gained power with Potiphar, and it got him into trouble with Potiphar’s wife and he landed in Prison.
Third time’s a charm? In prison he rose up into a place of leadership and it freed him. Pharaoh gave him all the leadership he could handle.
All along, Joseph focused on remaining true to himself. He never gave up. He didn’t sink down a hole; he just kept trusting himself and his giftings. Despite being rejected by his entire family (except one brother who kept him from dying). Despite being thrown in prison due to a false accusation. He stayed true.
There’s a great lesson here.
And his names for his kids are really interesting; his one son he names “God caused me to forget the hardships of my family.” Joseph was STILL hurt by this family rejection. It’s so incredible.
I have a lot of friends (and people I am working with in my new coaching gig) who are struggling at our age with being rejected by our families. The pain and hurt of neglect and rejection by people in this life whose purpose was to love and cherish us unconditionally has caused immense pain and trauma. The wounds continue to be inflected.
What is interesting about the name here, is Joseph isn’t running away from the rejection. By naming his kid “God caused me to forget the hardships of my family” he is turning at age 30 (give or take) and CREATING a reminder to remember the hardships. How often do we try to run away from the pain? Here Joseph leans into it.
And then? His next kid he names “God has made me fruitful in the land of my subjugation.” Joseph’s children remind him of Hashem’s faithfulness; even in dark times.
Are we finding ourselves in a prison? Emotionally? Physically? Spiritually? Are we remaining true to who we are; remembering the pain of our upbringing – and understanding it’s impact on us?
Are we finding ourselves walking out of this prison? Living in a new land that is not our home, but one in which we are given riches and blessings and abundance? It’s a matter of perspective.
We can look at the abundance in this land/place we don’t want to be and lament the reality of not being “home” where we want; or we can accept the reality and trust the faithfulness of Hashem.
Because Joseph may or may not have realized this, but his story was still going. We have the benefit of knowing EVERYTHING that went down was ALL ABOUT saving and providing for his father’s house.
We may not have the benefit of knowing the end of our story. But there is a point in which we need to trust it.
What do you think?
Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for Kislev 26, 5782
It’s day 2 of Hanukkah!!!
Todays portion begins with the question of who Pharaoh was going to appoint as leader of the initiative to oversee the famine preparation.
Pharaoh turns to Joseph and has connected the dots; since God gave Joseph the wisdom of the dream interpretation, no one is as wise as Joseph. He appoints Joseph in charge and places his trust in Joseph. He made a big deal of it, putting Joseph in some of his clothes and having him ride a chariot (the second chariot, not Pharaohs) so everyone would know Joseph had authority in Egypt.
Pharaoh named Joseph “Zaphenath-paneah.” Which means “Explainer of Hidden things.”
Then. In what seems like a bit of Irony; Pharoah gives Joseph Potiphar’s daughter Asenath for a wife. Take THAT Potiphar’s wife!
What does Joseph do as a new Leader? He visits the entire land of Egypt.
We see here that Joseph does what many good leaders do when they first join a team; they visit and go out to learn about the kingdom. Listening to the people on the front lines is a helpful way to collect data on how to best lead and provide guidance for the team.
How often do leaders do this “listening tour” for show; often having their own agenda and trying to see their agenda, without really listening and collecting information from the people who knew the most because they had direct impact with the front line? Joseph gives us a great example here!
During the seven years of abundance, Joseph collected grain and put them in the cities – they gathered so much grain they couldn’t count it anymore!
Then the portion ends by telling us that Joseph has two sons during this time; before the famine set in; the first was named “Menasseh” because Joseph said “God has caused me to forget (NaSHani) all my hardships in my father’s house.” And the second child was named “Ephraim” because Joseph said “God has made me fruitful (hiPH’rani) in the one of my subjugation.”
Interesting passage here. I think the leadership stuff is my biggest takeaway; truly listening to others vs selling an agenda.
What do you think?
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