Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 1 Tevet, 5784
Parsha Mikketz (Genesis 41:1 -44:17)
Fourth Portion: Genesis 41:53 – 42:18

Happy Sixth day of Hanukkah! Happy Rosh Chodesh! We are transitioning into a new moon.  Things seem dark right now. It is winter here.  And – tonight is the seventh candle. 7 represents us and humans on the earth. It represents perfection.  It is a perfection that is achievable via natural means. (More on this here).

When we are in Harmony with Nature, we can reach the most perfect connection when we light the candles tonight. Keep this in mind when we light the candles this evening.  And. If your first instinct is to tell yourself “but, tyler – I am NOT perfect.” My response is – in every moment – you ARE perfect.  You may not recognize that perfection – and the lack of recognition is what impacts our reactions to the world around us.  Hashem has worked every moment until this one for our good. You are perfection in creation right now. Tonight when you light the candles – you can recognize this perfect – or you can reject it.

Tomorrow night? You will still be perfect. It will be a different standard of perfection than where you are in this moment. Time is a human construct that is linear and measures distance. Distance from the past and to the future we desire.  For Hashem? Time is a construct that measures change. Growth. Development.  It does not measure perfection because we are perfect in every moment. That is spiritual freedom and liberation.

And Tomorrow night? The Eighth night of Hanukkah?  8 represents miracles. Supernatural perfection. From the link I shared; “while eight symbolizes that which is beyond nature and its (inherently limited) perfection.”

Full stop.  “Inherently limited perfection?”

Just ruminate on that concept for a moment.

Perfection. Limited.

Yes. Because our souls have been put in these limited bodies to experience this world. Tonight is a reminder of the fullness of the (limited) perfection we have in each moment.  Limited ONLY because of these physical bodies and the physical world we live in.

Tomorrow night? There are NO limits to the perfection of the light we share.

Ok – let’s dig into today’s portion.  Joseph has been put in charge of Egypt.  He’s been fruitful in the abundance of grain in Egypt. He’s been fruitful in having children.  What happens next?

54And the seven years of famine began, as Joseph had said, and there was famine in all the lands, but throughout the land of Egypt there was bread.

55When the entire land of Egypt hungered, the people cried out to Pharaoh for bread, but Pharaoh said to all the Egyptians, “Go to Joseph; what he tells you, do.”

56Now the famine spread over all the face of the land, and Joseph opened all [the storehouses] in which there was [grain], and he sold [it] to the Egyptians, and the famine intensified in the land of Egypt.

57And all [the inhabitants of] the land came to Egypt to Joseph to purchase, for the famine had intensified in the entire land.

I am not going to get into some of the extra torah teachings and commentaries about Joseph having the Egyptians circumcise themselves to buy the grain (see below for commentaries on this from a few years ago).  What I am going to focus on? Capitalism.

Because let’s face it.  If this happened today – if the government KNEW a crisis was coming and stored up resources for everyone else – we wouldn’t be too thrilled, would we? And the fact that Joseph SELLS the grain to the Egyptians? Having a monopoly on the market? Yeah. I am not sure we’d be too thrilled at this.

Just something I am reflecting on.  Let’s keep going:

1Jacob saw that there was grain being sold in Egypt; so Jacob said to his sons, “Why do you appear satiated?”

2And he said, “Behold, I have heard that there is grain being sold in Egypt. Go down there and buy us [some] from there, so that we will live and not die.”

3So Joseph’s ten brothers went down to buy grain from Egypt.

4But Joseph’s brother, Benjamin, Jacob did not send with his brothers, because, he said, “Lest misfortune befall him.”

5So the sons of Israel came to purchase among those who came, for the famine was in the land of Canaan.

This is interesting.  We cut back to Joseph’s dad – his sons are satiated. So we have to believe they had grain. They weren’t living in Egypt.  So why was Jacob worried about dying? Why did he send the brothers to Egypt?  It’s a curious question.  There are a few possibilities in my head:

• He was worried the famine would spread and he was being proactive
• He was worried (as the commentaries have indicated) that if it appeared they had food and resources, Egyptians would run out of money to buy from Joseph and they may look to plunder from Jacob

Or both? But regardless of why, Jacob sent his sons to Egypt to buy grain.  Let’s keep going:

6Now Joseph was the ruler over the land; it was he who sold grain to the entire populace of the land, and Joseph’s brothers came and prostrated themselves to him, with their faces to the ground.

7And Joseph saw his brothers, and he recognized them, but he made himself a stranger to them, and he spoke to them harshly, and he said to them, “Where do you come from?” And they said, “From the land of Canaan to purchase food.”

8Now Joseph recognized his brothers, but they did not recognize him.

Joseph recognizes his brothers. And it does appear he is angry with them – which seems a little out of character. Joseph, so far, in what we’ve discussed just let things unfold naturally – it never seemed like he held a grudge – not to Potiphar’s wife, not to his brothers – we don’t read in the Torah that Joseph was ruminating. That doesn’t mean he wasn’t ruminating – but it is interesting the Torah here isn’t clear on that.  The Torah IS clear – because it is mentioned twice. In a row:

7And Joseph saw his brothers, and he recognized them, but he made himself a stranger to them, and he spoke to them harshly, and he said to them, “Where do you come from?” And they said, “From the land of Canaan to purchase food.”

8Now Joseph recognized his brothers, but they did not recognize him.

Why? Why did he speak Harshly? What was his motive?

For this question, I put myself into the story – not from Joseph’s perspective but from his brothers.

If I am Joseph’s brother – specifically Judah. We know he felt a ton of guilt. He probably was beating himself up for a LONG time about how he treated Joseph. The behavior from Joseph was in line with Judah (and probably other brothers) feeling like they are getting a taste of “what they deserve.”

In a sense – Joseph was giving his brothers some catharsis. The experience of actually feeling feelings.

Joseph remembers his dream – of the brothers bowing down to them – and he saw it coming true with his own eyes.

9And Joseph remembered the dreams that he had dreamed about them, and he said to them, “You are spies; you have come to see the nakedness of the land.”

10And they said to him, “No, my master, your servants have come to buy food.

11We are all sons of one man. We are honest. Your servants were never spies.”

12But he said to them, “No! But you have come to see the nakedness of the land.”

13And they said, “We, your servants, are twelve brothers, the sons of one man in the land of Canaan, and behold, the youngest is with our father today, and one is gone.”

14And Joseph said to them, “This is just what I have spoken to you, saying, ‘You are spies.’

Joseph needed to test whether this was the moment his dream was coming true. Were they going to capitulate to him as ruler? Or were they going to fight him.  It was a question of sovereignty. Who was sovereign? Joseph or his brothers.

Joseph wanted to see how this would play out (in my opinion).  Let’s keep going:

15With this you shall be tested: By Pharaoh’s life, you shall not leave this place unless your youngest brother comes here.

16Send one of you and let him fetch your brother, and you will be imprisoned so that your words will be tested whether truth is with you, and if not, as Pharaoh lives, you are spies!”

17And he put them in prison for three days.

18On the third day, Joseph said to them: “Do this and live I fear God.

As I shared two years ago – Joseph WAS dropping hints to his brothers all along. That last line is certainly one of them.  Joseph explains they need to go get the youngest – and gave them three days in prison to think about it.

So what is our takeaway in all of this?

I can see a few:

1. From Joseph’s perspective – he has found himself after a harsh life being in a place of power. He sees a dream coming true. He is trying to allow that dream to come to fruition – and to establish healing. He wasn’t committed TO the brothers at this point – he was committed to providing a path BACK to the relationship with his family. In my opinion.
   1. Our takeaway is when we have power in our relationships – what do we do with that power – do we “forgive and forget?” Or do we release resentment and see if there is a path forward? Joseph seems to be establishing a new way for forgiveness. This doesn’t mean we have the right to treat those who have hurt us harshly – but we need to not be quick to allow them back into our hearts unless we know they’ve done the work.

Let me say that again.  When people hurt us. Break trust with us. “Forgive and forget” is a betrayal of ourselves. We are telling our self – “hey I know they hurt us, but we are just going to ignore that – I don’t care about how you felt in that moment back there.”  What Joseph offers is a way to HONOR the pain caused – to say to our self  “I see how this person hurt us. We acknowledge the hurt.  And – we release the resentment we feel. And. We can see if there is a path back to trust. We can be curious. But we don’t just “forgive and forget.”

Next takeaway:

2. From the brothers’ perspective – when we hurt others (and we WILL hurt others). When we’ve broken trust. It feels “better” to have someone “forgive and forget” what we did. We want to move as QUICKLY as we can from the difficult emotions of guilt/shame/embarrassment. What if, to restore trust – we need to sit with these feelings, and allow them to rise up in us because THAT is ALSO part of the human experience.  What if asking someone to “forgive and forget” is a betrayal of ourselves – to say to our past self – “you don’t matter enough to remember.”

Let’s add a new lesson on the journey to spiritual freedom and liberation – when we find ourselves stuck;

1. When feeling stuck or enslaved we must remember we have freedom and choice
   1. We can choose to dwell in the past and let those (we believe) who brought us to this place of being stuck live rent free within our heads (or consciousness). Or.
   2. We can accept the moment we are in; receive the next 30-60 seconds and decide what our purpose is. Are we safe? Are we secure? What is our mission? What are our values?
2. We must remain grounded in the moment. In our current reality. We can fight the current reality all we like – but all that will do is remind us we are slaves. We can make different choices to focus on our freedom.
3. When we are stuck or feeling enslaved – set boundaries for ourselves and COMMUNICATE THEM. Not to protect us from external sources. But to protect us from within.
4. When we are feeling stuck or enslaved? We can find ways to empower ourselves. Setting boundaries, yes. But also educating ourselves. Learning. Growth. Development.

Let’s add:

When we hurt someone – from a place of stuckness and enslavement – we need to honor the person who hurt – and allow ourselves to fully feel the guilt and shame and embarrassment – instead of wanting to run from it. Feeling those feelings will help us grow and develop in the perfection we are in every moment.

Even in THAT past moment when we hurt someone – EVEN UNINTENTIONALLY – we were perfect. Because it all unfolded for our (and their good). We have to go down sometimes to go up. It’s the lesson of the check mark.

This does NOT give us permission to hurt people. That is NOT the lesson. The goal here is spiritual freedom and liberation. We need to remember this.

Ok – those are my thoughts. What are yours?

Here is my commentary from the past two years:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for Kislev 27, 5783

Happy third day of Hanukkah!

Today I’m reflecting on the portion and passage and I’m really chewing on the idea of framing. In our heads how we frame things makes an important difference in how we respond. If we frame things out of fear, we will respond in fear. If we frame things out of trust, we will respond from a place of trust. Our internal framing shapes our reality in many ways.

For me? One of the things I’m reflecting on is the concept of silence. I have always framed silence as a weapon in my head. It has been used that way in my life: my mother’s silence as a child when all I wanted to hear was “it’s going to be ok. I love you” cut me deep inside. Being given the “silent treatment” is a childish way to respond to anger. Silence has been framed as a weapon in my head. Which is why my instinct when I encounter silence is to try and fill it. With words. With actions. With emails.

But silence is also a healing balm. When someone needs space to process – filling silence isn’t the move to make. Being silent and present is.

Like fire, silence is a tool. And how we wield that silence – and how we respond to others wielding of silence is not something we normally process or think about. But the framing of that is crucial on our spiritual journeys.

Because when Hashem is silent; how do we frame that? Do we see that as “bad?” Or is Hashem wanting us to just reflect and allow the silence to be a healing balm? Maybe Hashem’s silence is meant for us to heal? Just things I’m reflecting on.

What about you?

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for Kislev 27, 5782

Today’s portion moves us from the seven years of plenty into the seven years of famine.

Famine hits and everywhere struggles – except Egypt there was bread.

The next passage says “the entire land of Egypt was Hungry.” Rashi’s commentary says “all their grain which they had stored had rotted except Joseph’s.”

The people cried out to Pharaoh for bread, but Pharaoh told the people to “Go to Joseph. Do whatever he will tell you.”

Rashi points out that this refers to Joseph telling the Egyptians they needed to be circumcised in order to have the grain. There are two ways to look at this; one, it’s a power trip on Joseph’s part. Two, it’s a recognition that Hashem blesses the people of circumcision and at the time being circumcised connected you with that blessing. It was an act of mercy to let the Egyptians in.

It’s our choice how we choose to see this.

One additional thought from Rabbi Hanokh Zundel b. Joseph of Bialystok; “Joseph saw prophetically that the Jewish people would be exiled in Egypt. Therefore he tried to ensure the Egyptians would be circumcised, in order to prevent the Jewish people from abandoning the present of circumcision through assimilation.”

Rabbi David Pardo adds to this thought; “Even though Joseph forced the Egyptians to circumcise under duress, he hoped later in they would observe this commandment sincerely.

Or perhaps, Joseph was sending a message to his father that he was still alive. When Jacob would hear that the rule of Egypt was forcing the nation to circumcision he would realize it must be Joseph!”

Some interesting thoughts here.

The famine intensified and everyone came to Egypt to buy grain from Joseph.

Jacob saw there was grain in Egypt, and he said to his sons “Why are you showing off that we still have grain?”

The idea here is Jacob was concerned people would see that he and his sons ALSO had grain, and people would come and eat/take his food.

So Jacob told his sons to go to Egypt to buy grain.

They went to Egypt – all except Benjamin, who Jacob kept home because he was worried what happened to Joseph would happen to Benjamin.

Joseph’s brothers came to him and they threw themselves on the ground in front of him, with their faces to the ground. Joseph recognized his brothers but acted like a stranger to them.

His brothers did not recognize him. He challenged them; calling them spies.

The brothers told him they weren’t; they were brothers coming to buy grain. they tell him they are twelve brothers – with two missing- one stayed home with their father and the other being lost.

Joseph then tells them he was correct when he said they were spies. He tells them he will test his correctness that no one will leave until the youngest brother comes to Egypt. He told them to send one of the brothers to fetch the youngest, and everyone else will be imprisoned.

The idea here was Joseph did not want them to discover who he was, so he limited their exposure to the people who knew Joseph.

Joseph put them in prison for three days. The portion ends with Joseph coming to them and saying “if you do as I say you will live. I fear the almighty.“

Again, it seems like Joseph is dropping hints here.

The Spiritual Vitamin in the Torah I am reading says this;

“Everything that the Merciful One does is for the good” (Babylonian Talmud) Of course, you cannot always understand the ways of God, but you should be unshaken in your trust in God. This very faith is in itself a channel and vessel to receive God’s blessings.”

Looking at Joseph’s life it would be easy to stop at a point along the way and be angry at God for the apparent injustice. However, the end of the story is all about good for Joseph and his family.

On my Jewish journey, I am grateful for Meir Rubashkin and Gershon Klein for teaching me how incredibly important this concept is for my own personal faith. That regardless of my opinion in the moment, I must trust this all works out for MY good. That’s not just a theoretical good, it’s a practical good. This is still the biggest challenge of my faith each day. As “bad” things happen (from my perspective), it’s easy to say “why me?” Or be angry at God because things aren’t stable. But when I trust things are happening for my family and our literal good, I find myself in a good place. Not only that; it helps me watch for the blessings when they come and to recognize them as such.

What are your thoughts?