Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 29 Elul, 5783

Wow. Our last moments of 5783.  A year ago, I was mining diamonds in Herkimer. Today I am mining different diamonds (hopefully can talk more about that in the new year).

Today’s message is about internal repentance leading to external healing.  Our healing heals others.

This is our chance before the sun goes down on 5783 to do any last repentance and work needed to be done to have a clean slate in 5784. Apples and Honey.  Sweetness. We start over.

What do we need to repent of?

What are your thoughts?

Here is my commentary from a year ago:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for Tishri 12, 5783

As we approach the Jewish Holy Days of Sukkot (the feast of Tabernacles) we are reminded of Hashem’s provision for us. Todays portion I think will move us forward and propel us like rockets into the universe! Let’s dig in!

Deuteronomy 32:40:

For (when the Jewish people repent, I will turn My anger upon the nations!) I (will) raise up My hand to (Myself in) heaven, and say: Just as I live forever,

Listen to this line again. When we repent. Hashem will turn his anger towards the nations who persecute us. Our repentance not only brings internal healing; our higher selves will turn externally and start to deal with those who are rising against us. It all starts within though. I think this makes logical sense. If we turn inwards and navigate what is inside. Hashem is freed to move forward – not that he is bound; but he cares for us.

Think about this as a parent. When our child is hurt by someone; we have a choice to make. Do we work on the healing within first? Or do we seek external revenge on behalf of the child? The work as a parent is helping the child within. A hug. Validation. Internal healing. Strength. Courage. Self-compassion. Self-love. Once that is taken care of THEN we deal with the external issues. If we jump right to trying to fix the external issue? We miss the opportunity for healing. I believe this is what Hashem wants for us if we are to have true liberation and freedom. We must repent and heal within before the external is dealt with. That a powerful message.

I encourage you to reread that message. We have to be healed internally FIRST so Hashem can be freed to turn his anger on those who cause hurt and harm. And; before we jump to God being vengeful. Let’s remember what his anger on us brings; healing and repentance. That’s the goal. So, this isn’t a message of retribution- it’s a message that Hashem will turn his anger on the nations – and hopefully they turn to Hashem and find healing within. But if not, things won’t go well.

Let’s keep going.

32:41: (I swear that) when i sharpen the blade of My sword, and My hand grasps judgment (to punish the enemies of Israel), I will bring vengeance upon (them, for they are) My enemies (too). I will repay those who hate Me.

32:42: I will make My arrows drunk with (enemy) blood, and My sword will consume (their) flesh, on account of the blood of the slain (of Israel) and the captives (seized), from (even) the first attacks of the enemy.

32:43:  (At that time) the nations will sing praises for His people! When (they see how) He will avenge the blood of His servants (that they spilled), inflict revenge upon His enemies (for the robberies and losses they caused), and appease His land (and) His people (for their distress).

Hashem turns to the nations – and he brings vengeance. But with a purpose. The nations will sing praises for His people. His vengeance isn’t vengeance as we understand it. It’s vengeance that leads to healing. We cannot project the idea of revenge with vengeance. I don’t know about you, but In my head there isn’t much of a distinction between vengeance and revenge. But I think it comes down to purpose. Hashem doesn’t see revenge on our behalf. He seeks vengeance – for the purpose of healing and praise. It’s discipline. It’s love. That’s something I’m chewing on.

Hashem is fierce. His love is fierce for us. His love is fierce for our enemies. That could be interpreted as violent. How do we distinguish between fierce and violent? I don’t have good answers on that; would love your thoughts. Hashem’s love is safe; and it feels dangerous because it risks us stepping outside our comfort zone? How do we distinguish between risk and danger? Stepping outside our comfort zone could be perceived as unsafe, or it could be perceived as dangerous. But encouraging Natana to get on a horse on Saturday (see my weekend post for more information) required her to embrace the danger in her head. But she had to feel safe enough with me as her dad to do it. And the result was amazing. She got off the horse thrilled at what she accomplished. It was a dangerous situation that was just perception. The reality is she was safe the entire time.

So the perception of danger is just that. A perception. but how do we distinguish between them? again I’m curious as to your thoughts!