Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 15 Elul, 5783

Good morning! The moon has been GORGEOUS the past two nights, hasn’t it?  Today is more of a long passage – as we continue the blessings and the curses.  And here is what I think the theme is:

If we connect with Hashem (the universe, our soul, etc) we will have blessing.

If we distract, avoid, numb our soul (the universe, Hashem, etc) we will be cursed.

Again – this isn’t a threat.  It’s the natural consequences of not loving ourselves.  If we do not tap into the goodness of the universe around us? It’s wanting the best for us- so if we want and desire something that isn’t good for us – the universe is going to work to thwart our efforts.  It will appear as cursing – but it is a result of our free will.

Let me say that again.  It is a result of our free will.

Because I think we have the concept of “free will” all wrong.  We look at free will as the freedom to do whatever we want in whatever moment comes our way.  What if – the issue around our understanding of what “will” is?

What if “free will” is that we are FREE to be willing to allow the universe to unfold in a way that is designed for our good? Or to RESIST the universe?  That is the freedom we have?

As an example – we are driving, and we are running late. And a car cuts us off in traffic.  In that moment – we are FREE. We can CHOOSE how we respond.

• Oh well – I am not in control of anything right now, but I am free to trust things are unfolding exactly how they are for my good – and the good of those around us.  I am willing to receive whatever happens here.
• Crap – why is the universe working against me? I am going to be late! That guy deserves the WORST for cutting me off.  Why is the universe trying to thwart me.  I am UNWILLING to receive what happens here.

That’s free will.  And yes, we are free to choose – how do i react or respond to the situation?

Because sometimes – sadness exists to launch us into happiness.  Difficulties happen almost like a slingshot into joy and ease.  We just have to be willing to trust.

This is what spiritual freedom and liberation looks like (I think).  Willingness or resistance.  That is free will.

What are your thoughts?

Here’s my commentary from a year ago:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 20 Elul, 5782

Good morning! Today’s portion is longer, so let’s jump right in!

Moses is continuing with the blessings:

• If we observe the mitzvahs – Hashem will cause our enemies who rise up against us to be beaten before us; they will come out against us in one direction and flee from us in a panic in seven different directions.
• Hashem will direct His blessing to be with us – in everything we do.
• Hashem will establish us as His holy people. Nations will be in awe as they see what Hashem does for us.
• Hashem will grant us a good surplus of fruit in our womb, our livestock, our soul. He will open up His treasury- and will bless everything we put our hands to.
• We will be at the head, and not the tail. We will be at the top, and not the bottom.
• All of this is if we do good and listen to Hashem.

Now. What if we don’t? If we don’t listen to Hashem? The curses will come upon us:

• We will be cursed everywhere we go. We will be cursed when we arrive and when we depart.
• We will have shortages, confusion, turmoil in everything we do. We will be destroyed and vanish.
• We will be stricken with inflammation, illness, fevers, thirst, the sword of invading armies, withering of crops, we will be destroyed.
• In the opposite of the blessing, we will come out in one direction against our enemies and leave them in a panic is seven directions. We will be a dread to the nations of the earth.
• Our corpses will be bird food.
• We will be stricken with boils, with hemorrhoids (yes – HEMORRHOIDS is in the Torah), with oozing sores, with dry lesions.
• We will be stricken with insanity, with blindness and with bewilderment.
• We will be unsuccessful. We will be robbed all the time, no one will save us.
• We will betroth a woman, but another man will lie with her. We will build a house but not live in it.
• Our children will be given over to another people.
• We will be powerless.
• The foreigner will lend to us, but we will not lend to him. They will rise higher and higher while we descend lower and lower.
• All of this is happening because we did not listen to Hashem. Instead of serving Hashem, we will serve our enemies.

Let’s stop here.

There is a lot here. A lot of pressure. And as someone who has lived 50 years of life, I can tell you my life has been both/and- not either/or. This is because there have been times in my life I have not listened to Hashem. And there are times I have.

These aren’t “threats” I believe; I think they are more “natural consequences” of our behaviors and lives.

The Chumash has this encouragement for us:

“Any sad interlude in Jewish life is only transitory, and is based on the principle of “descent for the purpose of ascent.” In other words, any and all sad events in our history which are commemorated on the few sad days on our calendar are backwards steps which are necessary for a greater forward leap.”

So even when we are experiencing the consequences of not listening to Hashem, it’s for the purpose to bring us back to a place to listen and be blessed. I think that’s the message here.

True liberation and freedom is connected to listening – are we paying attention to our (good) desires and compassion? Or are we motivated because of our trauma and wounds, and trying to avoid being hurt? Given those two choices, trusting Hashem and doing good will bring us blessing. The more we act out of our trauma, the more the curses (which seem to be more trauma) will come.

Healing brings health and blessing

Trauma brings more trauma.

That seems to fit with what I see.

Google “trauma bonding” as evidence of this. When we bond over trauma, things don’t go well.

When we heal, (as Mark Nepo writes in the book of awakening) “As the moon brings sun to those who have turned from the light, an opened heart brings love to those struggling through darkness.”

Our open hearts in the midst of trauma will bring healing not only to ourselves but others around us.

We must explore this idea of trauma in our journey to freedom and liberation. How we navigate our traumas will impact the level of freedom we experience. Keep this in mind, friends!

What are your thoughts?