Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 2 Sivan, 5783. 46th Day of the Omer.

Today’s Omer Theme is “Netzach of Malchut” which is the “Endurance of Sovereignty”

From Chabad:

A person’s dignity and a leader’s success is tested by his endurance level. Will and determination reflect the power and majesty of the human spirit. The strength of one’s sovereignty.

How determined am I in reaching my goals? How strong is my conviction to fight for a dignified cause? How confident am I in myself? Is my lack of endurance a result of my low self-esteem? Do I mask my insecurities by finding other excuses for my low endurance level?

Exercise for the day: Act on something that you believe in but have until now been tentative about. Take the leap and just do it!

I have typically lined up with Chabad’s take on the Omer themes, but this week, I am seeing Sovereignty a little different.  Chabad has connected it to leadership, and I understand this – but on my personal journey, I connect Sovereignty with something within me.

For me the endurance of sovereignty is about moving through tough times and maintaining our own personal sovereignty.

Many times in our life we are confronted with the idea or possibility of sacrificing our beliefs, values, and personal convictions in order to make someone else happy.

Enduring these times and maintaining our own personal sovereignty (and not giving away our sovereignty to others) is what builds our capacity to love.  It may also build our capacity to lead.

Connecting this to leadership – I can see how sacrificing our sovereignty to make one person happy (or maintain peace) can get us off track of where we want to go.  It’s one thing to compromise strategy on how to get to where we are going – but to sacrifice our own personal sovereignty? That seems problematic.

As we move towards Shavuot – and we look towards Hashem to provide us direction, the question keeps coming back to – who is sovereign in our lives?  Does Hashem and the Torah define our values? What role do we play in that? Are we motivated by something within us? Or are we looking externally for stability, direction?

The Torah and Hashem might be considered “external” sources that define our sovereignty.  Unless – we pull them within us and allow them to be internal.  It’s all a matter of our hearts.  If we aren’t fully convinced, it will not be external.  And that’s ok.  Not something to judge ourselves on – but to be curious about.  Why?  Why do I feel the way I do? How does this conflict with a value I hold stronger to? Where did that value come from? These are important questions as we explore our sovereignty.

What are your thoughts?