Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 2 Tammuz, 5784
Parsha Bukkat – “Suprarational command”: (Numbers 19:1 – 22:1)
Second Portion: Numbers 19:18 – 20:6
Good morning! As we enter this new work week after the holiday weekend, it’s time to move from looking externally for the resolution of our own problems to looking within.
I see often with my children (and even myself) how we want OTHERS to “fix” our problems for us. “Dad! I’m bored!” or “Dad! I’m Hungry!” or “Dad! My sibling is bothering me!”
As a parent, my instinct is to want to fix this for them. And? At 6 months old, that’s our role as parents. A six month old can’t fix their own problem for food. My 6 year old? Can easily open the fridge and get and apple. The issue becomes – from a maturity standpoint – when we ask the external to fix an internal problem? We may not like the options. My 8 year old says “I’m hungry” and asks for chips (which are in a cabinet she cannot reach). I say – you can have a hard boiled egg, or a piece of fruit. “I don’t want those dad!” I am trying to fix her hunger – she wants to soothe her discomfort.
How much more as adults are we wanting to “soothe our discomfort” rather than look within for the solution to our own suffering? This is the path of maturity. I’m hungry. Ok – then certain foods will give my body what I need. Other foods will soothe the temporary feeling. The feeling of hunger is a message – the body needs energy. We are treating the symptom and not the problem if we soothe the feeling. We have to get curious.
This is what Tammuz is about – the external becomes darkened – and we are encouraged to look within to see. We have light within us – the spirit (Neshama) that lights the way.
As we approach today’s portion, we are learning about death. What to do when someone dies. It started with the red cow – ashes in water.
I’m reflecting on grief. When someone dies? Ashes in water may represent tears. And the lack of grief? May block flow. Denial and anger can trip us up and keep us in the past. To move forward, the ashes in water can help us restore flow! So let’s dig into more – what happens when we touch a dead body:
18A ritually clean person shall take the hyssop and dip it into the water and sprinkle it on the tent, on all the vessels, and on the people who were in it, and on anyone who touched the bone, the slain person, the corpse, or the grave.
19The ritually clean person shall sprinkle on the unclean person on the third day and on the seventh day, and he shall cleanse him on the seventh day, and he shall wash his clothes and bathe in water, and he shall become ritually clean in the evening.
So the first thing I see here. When we encounter death? We need someone ELSE to help us restore our flow. It takes an outsider to come in and provide tears and encourage tears for those who are grieving. And? It’s not immediately.
We see a pattern. Third day and Seventh day, the outsider is called to come in and spread the red cow ash water (tears) to support the cleansing and flow of those closest to the person who passed away.
We are allowed time to grieve. And 3rd day and 7th day? Maybe this ALSO means 3rd week and 7th week? 3rd month and 7th month? 3rd year and 7th year?
Maybe these are cycles. Grief cycles? Shedding of tears? Just something I am reflecting on. And – outsiders DO come to support our healing – and maybe our role is to be open to that. Not seek it out?
Let’s keep going:
20If a person becomes unclean and does not cleanse himself, that soul shall be cut off from the congregation, for he has defiled the Sanctuary of the Lord; the sprinkling waters were not sprinkled upon him. He is unclean.
What if “unclean” is a metaphor for shut down emotionally? If we block ourselves from grief, maybe that is what cuts us off from the congregation? From the community? From RECEIVING love from others?
Opening the channels of love to one another – RECEIVING support – the “ritually impure” person coming in to sprinkle red cow water – tears – allows us the healing and grief we need to deal with death. And maybe it isn’t the death of a person per se? But the death of a dream? An ideal? A relationship? A career?
Where do we need tears from our grief today?
Let’s keep going:
21This shall be for them as a perpetual statute, and the one who sprinkles the sprinkling waters shall wash his clothes, and one who touches the sprinkling waters shall be unclean until evening.
22Whatever the unclean one touches shall become unclean, and anyone touching him shall be unclean until evening.
And this is a warning too – those who have blocked themselves from grief? They will impact our own grief processes as well. And? If we care about them? We are ok to love them in their struggle.
This is where we begin to see a shift in the Torah. To recap our journey so far?
- We started with dealing with our cravings – we camped out and navigated our cravings. Meat. Gotta have meat.
- Then we dealt with our Ego. Arrogance.
- We’ve been camped in this place where the spies went into the land and came back afraid. We’ve been dealing with fear.
- We focused on courage
- Then sacrifice
- Now it would seem we are exploring grief.
Let’s see what happens next:
20:1The entire congregation of the children of Israel arrived at the desert of Zin in the first month, and the people settled in Kadesh. Miriam died there and was buried there.
Whoa. So – we had already LEFT our fear camp. We just didn’t realize it. We have moved to Kadesh. And what happened? Miriam dies. The Torah sets this up BEAUTIFULLY!
Let’s see what happens in the camp:
2The congregation had no water; so they assembled against Moses and Aaron.
3The people quarreled with Moses, and they said, “If only we had died with the death of our brothers before the Lord.
4Why have you brought the congregation of the Lord to this desert so that we and our livestock should die there?
5Why have you taken us out of Egypt to bring us to this evil place; it is not a place for seeds, or for fig trees, grapevines, or pomegranate trees, and there is no water to drink.
Whoa. How BEAUTIFUL is this? It’s like Hashem is giving us an object lesson on grief, right? Miriam dies, and the LITERAL flow of water is blocked. And? What is the response?
ANGER.
And – they aren’t angry at Miriam’s death. They are angry at the blockage of the flow of water. Moses and Aaron lost a sister. They were grieving. And the people? They came at them. In their grief. Talk about a lack of compassion!
ANGER.
Death and Grief? Anger is generally one of the first stages after denial.
There was no water to put the red cow ashes in. There were no tears. Miriam was a source of flow for the people. The feminine energies within us? Creates the flow of abundant feelings within. When we cut off the feminine energies – the Miriams in us? We struggle to feel. We turn to anger.
Let’s finish this off:
6Moses and Aaron moved away from the assembly to the entrance of the Tent of Meeting, and they fell on their faces. [Then] the glory of the Lord appeared to them.
All Moses and Aaron could do is isolate themselves and go to the Tent of Meeting – the heart. And they fell on their faces. They humbled themselves. And Hashem shows up!
This is a BEAUTIFUL place to camp in, isn’t it? We went from cravings, to ego, to fear. In our fear we went from courage, to sacrifice, to grief. And all of this brings us to humbling ourselves before the Universe. To realize – we are “not in charge.”
So here’s the question for us: Where do we need to release our tears of grief to open the flow within us and let our light shine in the darkness around us?
Here is my thoughts from two years ago:
Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 5 Tamuz, 5782
This mornings Torah thought begins with a morning blessing taken from a traditional Jewish Siddur (prayer book):
“Lord our God, make the teachings of Your Torah pleasant in our mouths, and in the mouths of Your entire people, the House of Israel; and may we, our children, and the children of Your entire people the House of Israel, all be knowers of Your Name and students of Your Torah for its own sake. Blessed are You, Lord, who teaches the Torah to His people Israel.”
This is my blessing for us as we dig into todays Torah portion!
We left yesterday talking about the Red heifer – one of God’s suprarational commands.
Today we are going back to more purity laws; around touching a dead body. It Is interesting this is next, given immediately after, in todays portion, we read about Miriam’s passing (spoiler alert!)
So we left off yesterdays portion, and will pick it up with God telling Moses that anyone who touches a dead body will become ritually impure for 7 days.
God tells Moses that on day 3 and 7, we should ritually purify ourselves with the ashes of the red cow to become ritually pure. If we do NOT do this, we will not become ritually pure.
God makes it clear this process is crucial, because if it is not performed, even if he immersed in the ritual pool, his ritual impurity remains.
We move now to the man that dies in a tent.
– anyone who enters the tent and anything in the tent will be ritually impure for 7 days
– any open vessel which has no seal becomes ritually impure
– anyone who is in an open field and touches a person killed by the swift or a corpse or a human bone or grave will be ritually impure for seven days.
The midrash has something interesting to say about this:
God blamed Adam for introducing death into the world, saying, “On the day you eat from it you will certainly die” (Genesis 2:17) What could you compare this to?
To a man who wished to divorce his wife. Before he goes into his home, he writes out a divorce document and he has it ready in his hand. He then looks for a way to hand it to her.
He says, “May I have a drink of water, please?
She gives him the water. When he takes the glass from her, he says, “Here is your divorce.”
What have I done wrong?” she asks.
“Get out of my house, he retorts. “You have served me a warm drink”
“It seems” she says, “that you already knew that I was going to serve you a warm drink. You had already prepared a bill of divorce and brought it with you!”
That is what Adam told God. “Master of the Universe! The Torah predated the world by two thousand years, and in the Torah it is written, “This is the law regarding a man that dies in a tent.” If You hadn’t already decreed death for mankind, You wouldn’t have written this in the Torah.”
So basically the midrash is telling us that a husband or wife setting their spouse up for divorce when they had every intention of divorcing them is like Adam blaming God for death. When In reality God didn’t decree death for humans; it was a choice we made. There was no recognition of the choice.
In the divorce example, the husband made a choice to give his wife a divorce. And then? He gaslights her into believing she caused the divorce because of the drink she served him.
That is NOT how Hashem works!
What are your thoughts?
Let’s get back to the Torah! What do we do with the impure person?
We take the ashes of the burned purification offerings (of the red heifer) and place them in a vessel filled with spring water.
Todays portion picks up here:
A ritually pure person should take hyssop, dip it into the water, sprinkle it on the tent, on all the vessels, and the people who were in the tent. And anyone who touched the bone, the killed person, the corpse or the grave.
The ritually pure person should sprinkle the ash water on the ritually impure person on the 3rd and 7th day.
On the 7th day, he will become ritually pure. But first, he should immerse himself and wash in the water of the mikveh and he will become ritually pure in the evening.
If a person becomes ritually impure and does not purify himself and goes into the sanctuary? Their soul will be cut off from the congregation.
This is an eternal suprarational law: one who carries the sprinkling waters should immerse his clothes in the ritual pool and one who comes into contact with the sprinkling waters will only be ritually impure until the evening.
Anyone a ritually impure person touches becomes ritually impure. Anyone touching him will be ritually impure until the evening.
Remember; we are talking about RITUAL impurity. For the purposes of entering the sanctuary.
Before we close the portion by talking about Miriam’s death (spoiler alert!) I wanted to focus back on the red heifer. It didn’t make sense at the time; but Hashem also has the process foundational for the future. We may not see the why? Hashem asks us to do something – Maybe it’s going through a difficulty in our life? maybe is the need to confront someone or something that is working against our community? But regardless, we can trust the process to work out, if we focus on the “how?” How does Hashem want me to navigate? What am I called to do? Even if it doesn’t make sense?
What are your thoughts?
Ok; let’s close out todays portion.
Keep in mind, commentary tells us there is a 40 year gap between the event of the red heifer and the death of Miriam. That is an important factor.
The Torah tells us (Numbers 20:1) that the entire next generation of Israel (all the OJs – Original Jews had passed on) arrived in the desert of sin in the first month and the people settled in Kadesh.
Miriam died there. And was buried there.
Just sit there for a moment. That’s a big deal.
And then we learn in verse 2:
The congregation had no water, so they hanged up against Moses and Aaron, and the people quarreled with Moses.
What??? Moses and Aaron just lost a sister!!
Some questions before moving forward:
Why does this story immediately follow the red heifer? Why is there no water? Is that connected with Miriam’s death?
We have a few writings to chew on regarding all of this:
Rabbi Rochamim Shealtiel Jacob Ninio wrote this:
“Why does the story of Miriam’s death follow straight after the laws of the Red Heifer? To teach you that just as sacrifices bring atonement, the death of the righteous also brings atonement.
She died through a “kiss” from God’s mouth, like the great saints, and not through the angel of death, the way of ordinary people. Why, then, does the verse not state “by God’s mouth” as it does with Moses and Aaron? Because it is not respectful to speak of God kissing a woman (Babylonian Talmud, Mo’ed Katan 28a).
The leaders of the generation did not feel the need to publicly grieve Miriam’s passing at all, or to eulogize her, because she was, after all, a woman. Had any religious instruction emanated from her that there was now a need to make a big deal? Instruction was given to Israel by Moses and Aaron! Even the well that had disappeared when Miriam died would, without doubt, return in the merit of Moses and Aaron.
To counteract this faulty line of reasoning, the Torah makes a point of mourning her passing; explicitly, “Miriam died there.” In fact, she died through a “Divine kiss,” just like her brothers indicating that she was on par with them spiritually.
And her passing made an immediate impression, “the congregation had no water” (V. 2) water being a metaphor for Torah. Suddenly, even the great scholars could not understand the Torah properly, because the Divine Presence had removed itself from Israel. This was to teach everyone- including the leaders of that generation who had not mourned for her–how righteous she had been. It was due to her merit that the Divine Presence had rested over Israel, and this message soon became very clear to the Sages.” (End quote)
That is interesting commentary coming from a 19th century Rabbi! Miriam has a special place in the Torah. And yet the people of the time didn’t recognize it. They were a new generation that forgot or didn’t really appreciate the past. How relatable is that???????
Next, Rabbi Shneur Zalman writes about the connection to the lack of water:
“From here we learn that throughout the forty years they had the well in Miriam’s merit (Rashi, 11th century).
There were three siblings, Moses, Aaron and Miriam. Miriam was the moon, Moses the sun, and Aaron the right arm. At first Miriam died – the moon departed and the well disappeared. Then, the right arm broke. Afterwards, the sun was gathered in and it was darkened. Happy is the generation in which Moses, Aaron, and Miriam existed in the world! (Zohar).
A few have the custom to draw water every Saturday night from wells or springs because the well of Miriam passes through all the wells after the conclusion of each Sabbath. Whoever Finds it and drinks from It will be healed from all his Illnesses.” (end quote)
Interesting thoughts around Miriam’s death. But I think there’s more.
I feel the connection to the red heifer is God’s honoring the preparation of the people for Miriam’s death. It was connected to water. The red heifer was meant to have ashes placed in water to purify the drinker. Miriam seems to be seen in these Torah portions, connected to water. When Miriam left. So too did the water.
She was a source. And even though she challenged Moses in the desert, and got a disease because of it; she was STILL honored in the end by Hashem. This is another example of Hashem’s grace and mercy in the Torah. We get it wrong so often that the Torah is about a harsh God judging His people. But this is a story of redemption work. Miriam was redeemed from her challenge to Moses. We can learn God forgives us. He takes care of us. And He honors us: especially when we engage with the mitzvahs! But even when we don’t!
Let’s close out the portion today. The people are grumbling about a lack of water. The new generation of Jews seem to be repeating the talking points of their parents. The question I have is whether they really believed what they were saying to Moses, or whether they were saying that and fighting Moses because that’s the family system they grew up in? I’m curious as to how God is going to deal with this!
And we are left with that exact cliffhanger.
Moses and Aaron went away from the assembly and went to the entrance of the Tent of meeting, and they fell on their faces.
The portion today closes; “Then the glory of God appeared to them.”
Stay tuned until tomorrow when we see what God does! Is God going to respond in Anger? I’m Mercy? He must be growing tired of all our insolence! We lack trust that He is going to work it all out for our good.
What are YOUR thoughts?
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