Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 21 Iyar, 5784 –Day 36 of Omer
Parsha Be-Hukkotai – “My Laws” (Leviticus 26:3 – 27:34)
Fourth Portion: Leviticus 27:1 – 27:15

Good morning! Today is the 36^th Day of the Omer. We start a new theme this week: Bonding.

From Chabad:

Bonding is the ultimate emotional connection. While the first five qualities (love, discipline, compassion, endurance and humility) are interactive, they manifest duality: the lover and the beloved. The emphasis is on an individual’s feelings, not necessarily on mutuality.

Bonding, on the other hand, is a complete fusion of the two. Without bonding no feeling can be truly realized. Bonding means connecting; not only feeling for another, but being attached to him. Not just a token commitment, but total devotion. It creates a channel between giver and receiver. Bonding is eternal. It develops an everlasting union that lives on forever through the perpetual fruit it bears. Bonding is the foundation of life. The emotional spine of the human psyche. Every person needs bonding to flourish and grow. The bonding between mother and child; between husband and wife; between brothers and sisters; between close friends. Bonding is affirmation; it gives one the sense of belonging; that “I matter”, “I am significant and important”. It establishes trust – trust in yourself and trust in others. It instills confidence. Without bonding and nurturing we cannot realize and be ourselves.

Bonding channels all five previous qualities into a constructive bond, giving it the meaning “foundation”. Whereas all other human feelings are individual emotions, separate stories of a building, each a necessary component of human experience, bonding channels and integrates them all into one bond which creates a foundation upon which the structure of human emotions firmly stands. Bonding is giving all of yourself not just part; it is not one emotion but all of them. So Yesod completes the spectrum of the first six emotions.

The foundation of Yesod is different from an ordinary foundation. It does not just rest beneath the higher levels of the structure, but encompasses them all. An effective bedrock of the emotional psyche cannot remain separate but must include and permeate all the emotions. Only then can bonding be constructive and everlasting.

This is critical. How much do we focus on our bonds? How what we say will either draw us in or push someone away? And? How much do we decide consciously who to bring in and who to push away?  These are the things I am reflecting on.

Today we focus on the “Love of Bonding”

From Chabad:

Love is the heart of bonding. You cannot bond without love. Love establishes a reliable base which allows bonding to build on. If you have a problem bonding, examine how much you love the one (or the object) you wish to bond with. Do I try to bond without first fostering a loving attitude? Is my bonding expressed in a loving manner?

Exercise for the day: Demonstrate the bond you have with your child or friend through an act of love.

For me? The concept is love and bonding – which comes first? Do we try to bond without fostering a loving attitude? Or do we foster love – and that is what drives us bond? How do we connect with others? Do we connect out of obligation or out of love?

And, how connected and bonded are we to OURSELVES? Do we love ourselves enough to connect with ourselves? Or are we struggling to connect because we feel obligated to?  Let’s take this energy and dig into the Torah.

27:1And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying,

2Speak to the children of Israel and say to them: When a man expresses a vow, [pledging the] value of lives to the Lord,

3the [fixed] value of a male shall be as follows: From twenty years old until sixty years old, the value is fifty silver shekels, according to the holy shekel;

4And if she is a female, the value is thirty shekels;

5And if [the person is] from five years old until twenty years old, the value of a male shall be twenty shekels, while that of a female shall be ten shekels;

6And if [the person is] from one month old until five years old, the value of a male shall be five silver shekels, while the value of a female shall be three silver shekels;

7And if [the person is] sixty years old or over, if it is a male, the value shall be fifteen shekels, while for a female, it shall be ten shekels.

8But if he is [too] poor to [pay] the valuation [amount], he shall stand him up before the kohen, and the kohen shall evaluate him according to how much the one who is vowing his value can afford.

I wrote two years ago about the challenge of this passage. The Torah talks about “value” of what to pay the priests when dedicating someone to the Lord.  The “value of a male” vs the “value of a female.”

It feels really problematic the “value” of a man is higher than the “value” of a woman.

What if?

What if the reason people had to pay MORE for the man to the priest was because the priest would be required to more work to navigate men than women?   Like emotional labor? Spiritual labor? What if this was a recognition by the Torah that is was going to cost the priest more to work with a dude than a woman, and the priest should be paid appropriately for this?

I feel like that makes a lot of sense to me. You had to pay the priest more because the work needed to help a dude become enlightened was going to be more.  Almost double the work.

Let’s keep going…

9Now, if an animal of whose type is [fit] to be brought as an offering to the Lord, whatever part of it the person donates to the Lord, shall become holy.

10He shall not exchange it or offer a substitute for it, whether it be a good one for a bad one, or a bad one for a good one. But if he does substitute one animal for another animal, [both] that one and its replacement shall be holy.

11And if it is any unclean animal, of whose type shall not be brought as an offering to the Lord, then he shall stand up the animal before the kohen.

12The kohen shall then evaluate it whether it is good or bad; like the evaluation of the kohen, so shall it be.

13But if he redeems it, he shall add its fifth to its value.

So this is interesting. They could bring an unclean animal as an offering? An the Kohen could decide whether it is good or bad? That is crucial. So is the Torah saying then – if all your cows are blemished – but you have this AMAZING pig, bring it? Just curious.

14And if a man consecrates his house [to be] holy to the Lord, the kohen shall evaluate it whether good or bad; as the kohen evaluates it, so shall it remain.

15But if the one who consecrated it redeems his house, he shall add to it a fifth of its valuation money, and it shall be his.

So we start with a human’s value and the work needed to redeem it. We move to an animal’s value – adding extra cost to a pig. Then the house.

So basically? Men? We are like pigs.  Maybe that is the message.

What are your thoughts?

Here are my thoughts from two years ago:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 24 Iyar, 5782

Today is the 39th day of the Omer!

Good morning friends! Todays passage is going to once again be challenging for us given our current values.

Let’s dig in.

The Torah starts by talking about vows; and the ”value” of an adult or child’s life to God’s sanctuary – and the pledge that must be given.

1. Between 20-60 years old, 50 sheckles for a man. 30 for a woman.

Ugh. Before I comment let’s keep going

2. Between 5-20 years old, 20 Sheckles for a boy and 10 for a girl
3. Between 1 month and 5 years, 5 sheckles for a boy, 3 for a girl.
4. Over 60? Male is 15 sheckles and female is 10.

If he is too poor to pay, then the one who makes the pledge should bring the person to the priest and the priest should evaluate them based on how much the person pledging can afford.

Ok. So. There are some thoughts to he had here.

1. The different financial “values” on gender is problematic on one hand. But also communicates some things on the other hand.
2. It is clear in Torah that all of us (male and female) have infinite value. So this seems purely rooted in a form of capitalism (maybe?)
3. These are what one would PAY the priest. You could argue that it cost more to pledge a man because they were LESS valuable financially – in other words – I have two people- you tell me you’ll take them off my hands if I pay you $50 and the other you’ll take off my hands if I give $30. That seems counter intuitive when it comes to value.

What are your thoughts?

We move from money to consecrating animals to the Temple.

The Torah says whatever is consecrated if an animal that part become holy. For example if a limb of an animal is brought – that becomes holy.

If someone tries to bring a blemished animal? Then basically the priest will determine the consecration value.

The animal will be offered to be sold. If someone else purchases it, then it will be sold for what the priest set the price at. If the original owner wants to redeem it, they need to add a fifth to its value!

So you better be sure you want to do this. Because it will cost you to go back.

The same goes for consecrating houses.

I think the main idea in today’s portion is about dedicating things to holy purpose. Whether it be a person, an animal, or even a house. If you are saying you want holiness – to be set apart, you better be sure!

Thoughts?