Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 25 Cheshvan, 5785

Good morning! Let me start by sharing, this is now the second time I have “dug this well” today for my Torah thoughts.  Just as I was getting to publish them the first time I wrote them? Something went wrong and I lost it all.

It was a BEAUTIFUL opportunity to learn the lessons of abundant wells being dug up, and then “filled in.”  This will make sense in a little bit (I hope).

Today’s message is all about abundance. And how Isaac navigated it.  I have recently been writing about abundance, and even wrote yesterday I was desiring “mundane abundance.” I think what I was wanting?  Comfort.  I think I mistook abundance and comfort.   What if abundance causes chaos? Will we choose comfort? Or will with choose chaos? And we don’t CREATE comfort or chaos – we can choose how to RECEIVE the world around us.

Let’s dig in.  Last year, I wrote this, and it feels very salient:

Can we handle abundance in our lives that would cause our neighbors to feel envious? How do we navigate envy from others? Do we take it personally? Do we feel guilty? Do we want to fight it? Think about Isaac. He dug these wells. He was prosperous.  And. The people filled them in. Blocked his abundance. The king of the people sees this and sees what is happening – he knows; Isaac and his family haven’t done anything to deserve this. But the King wants peace. He tells Isaac to move away.  And Isaac? Instead of fighting for the land he had built abundance on?

He left.  The land wasn’t something for Isaac to fight over. He listened to the king. He left.

When abundance arrives, we don’t often think about the impact our receiving abundance might have on those around us. The king knew the abundance Isaac was receiving – and he saw the conflict it was causing in his land.  He asks Isaac to leave. The people were not ready to receive Isaac and his family in their abundance.  And what happened when they left? They dug new wells.  And lo and behold:

26:19And Isaac’s servants dug in the valley, and they found there a well of living waters.

So, Christian friends – Jesus was not the ONLY well of living water. He was the well of living water at the time he was living. Isaac is ALSO a miracle birth – he was in a sense “immaculate.” Because Sarah did not have any eggs for Abraham’s seed to fertilize. Hashem supernaturally gave Sarah an egg for Abraham to fertilize. Isaac was the Alpha. And he discovered the FIRST well of living water.

This is what I wrote a year ago:

I think Isaac and his servants figured out the living water of Hashem.  That the lesson and takeaway here was that the chaos leads to beauty (as we discussed yesterday entering into this new moon cycle of Kislev).  We can choose to fight, or we can allow.

And even when we are afraid – the author of our lives is poetic.  Bringing us back to a starting point each time.  Because Isaac was brought back home – to where his father had dug wells.

It would seem (in my opinion) that the point of our story is this – taking the risk to leave “home” to go out into the world and engage. Then, when things get hard; and chaotic; we come home again.

If we want abundance? It is going to lead to chaos. And that chaos creates new realities that are BEAUTIFUL. We can fight and resist this chaos, or we can receive it. And? To do this – we have to leave home and come back again.

The timing of this is beautiful for me. This past weekend, I went back to Connecticut for the first time in 36 years. I was born in Connecticut. It is where I landed in this reality we all find ourselves to be. What I discovered there was a semblance of “home” that I needed to see. It was abundant. It was fruitful. It was a new well dug into my life. Except it wasn’t new. It was the redigging of an old well that had been covered up by the chaos of life when my parents moved us away to West Chester, PA in 1976.

And those who have followed my journey? You understand how two years ago I returned to my home in West Chester, and that was part of redigging old wells of abundance that had been covered over.  this connects to what I wrote a year ago:

I think about my process of spiritual awakening.  My first one led to a LOT of arguments.  I wanted to be “right.” I had lived my entire life one way – had major epiphanies – which led to a LOT of spiritual arguments. That led me to New York (from California).

My second awakening led me to be less argumentative – but that led to harassment. I had to move again.

I am getting ready to enter a time I believe the Lord is “making room” for me. And I will be fruitful in the land. I am trusting this process. I wonder if that is for all of us? Have we been in a fight, digging wells for ourselves that are constantly filled in by those around us who are envious? Do we fight over the well? Or do we just move to the next one?

So – if you have found the well of living water; but are arguing over it with (or facing harassment from) others? Maybe it’s time to move away and dig ANOTHER well – make room. Be fruitful.

So this idea of a spiritual home – moving from arguing to harassment because of the abundance I have discovered within? And returning “home” when needed? This is the journey we are on. Moving and receiving the chaos around us to return to wells because the timing is better.

Because? Those wells I re-dug in Connecticut and West Chester? There was a lot more room for my abundance now then there was growing up.

So which wells are you digging? And? How much focus we are paying attention to the pipes and pumps that bring the well water into our home?

Because it isn’t just about digging the well. It’s about moving the living water within us. If our spout is not functioning – we can have abundant wells – and still feel lacking within.

These are my thoughts. What are yours?

Here are my thoughts from last year:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 1 Kislev, 5784
Parsha Toledot: (Genesis 25:19- 28:9)
Third Portion: Genesis 26:13 – 26:22

So; yesterday I realized I “double dipped” and did two portions instead of one.  If you read yesterday’s portion? This may be a bit of a repeat. I went back and edited the portion yesterday to close it out at the end point of the second portion.  So if you are joining us for the first time? I encourage you to read “Part 1” of these thoughts yesterday here.

As we enter this new moon cycle – the cycle of Kislev; the Orchestra has now tuned up and the symphony is about to begin.  Are we ready to receive it?  As we begin today’s portion, let’s keep in mind the tapestry of our lives is getting rewoven in this new cycle.  Here’s how the portion starts about Isaac (Genesis 26:13-14)

13And the man became great, and he grew constantly greater until he had grown very great.

14And he had possessions of sheep and possessions of cattle and much production, and the Philistines envied him.

Isaac was blessed. The lie of Rebecca being his sister was rewarded. And. This really does look like a blessing doesn’t it? And yet the story isn’t over.

Isaac and Rebecca don’t live happily ever after.  Because the story made the Philistines envious. Here’s what happened next (Genesis 26:15 -16):

15And all the wells that his father’s servants had dug in the days of Abraham his father the Philistines stopped them up and filled them with earth.

16And Abimelech said to Isaac, “Go away from us, for you have become much stronger than we.”

So let’s look at this from the Philistines’ perspective.  Isaac lies to them and Abimelech almost takes Rebecca as his wife.  Certain destruction.  Abimelech tells the people “don’t touch these people who almost brought destruction on us.  Leave them alone.” And, as they are left alone? They prosper. They dig wells and bring water to their crops and food and cattle. And the people get envious of this.  They even start to fill in the wells they are so envious.

How does this apply to our lives?  Can we handle abundance in our lives that would cause our neighbors to feel envious? How do we navigate envy from others? Do we take it personally? Do we feel guilty? Do we want to fight it? Think about Isaac. He dug these wells. He was prosperous.  And. The people filled them in. Blocked his abundance. The king of the people sees this and sees what is happening – he knows; Isaac and his family haven’t done anything to deserve this. But the King wants peace. He tells Isaac to move away.  And Isaac? Instead of fighting for the land he had built abundance on?

He left.  The land wasn’t something for Isaac to fight over. He listened to the king. He left. Let’s keep reading”

17And Isaac went away from there, and he encamped in the valley of Gerar and dwelt there.

18And Isaac again dug the wells of water which they had dug in the days of his father, Abraham, and the Philistines had stopped them up after Abraham’s death; and he gave them names like the names that his father had given them.

19And Isaac’s servants dug in the valley, and they found there a well of living waters.

They left. They trusted. And – they continued to dig wells. I wrote about this last year.  The wells aren’t JUST physical wells.  They seem to be connected to “spiritual awakenings.” Isaac’s servants trusted, and they found a well of living water.

For my Christian friends who believe Jesus and the Holy Spirit are the “well of living waters” um.  Maybe Isaac dug and found Jesus in the ground – but I don’t think that is true.

I think Isaac and his servants figured out the living water of Hashem.  That the lesson and takeaway here was that the chaos leads to beauty (as we discussed yesterday entering into this new moon cycle of Kislev).  We can choose to fight, or we can allow.

And even when we are afraid – the author of our lives is poetic.  Bringing us back to a starting point each time.  Because Isaac was brought back home – to where his father had dug wells.

It would seem (in my opinion) that the point of our story is this – taking the risk to leave “home” to go out into the world and engage. Then, when things get hard; and chaotic; we come home again.  And lest Isaac get possessive of the well? We close the portion with this:

20And the shepherds of Gerar quarreled with Isaac’s shepherds, saying, “The water is ours”; so he named the well Esek, because they had contended with him.

21And they dug another well, and they quarreled about it also; so he named it Sitnah.

22And he moved away from there, and he dug another well, and they did not quarrel over it; so he named it Rehoboth, and he said, “For now the Lord has made room for us, and we will be fruitful in the land.”

Esek means “argument” and Sitnah means “harassment.”

Isaac contended with the well of living water. People came for it. Argued over it. Harassed him about it.  But instead of fighting? He just dug another well. And then moved far away from home again and dug yet another well.  “The Lord has made room for us, and we will be fruitful in the land.”

I think about my process of spiritual awakening.  My first one led to a LOT of arguments.  I wanted to be “right.” I had lived my entire life one way – had major epiphanies – which led to a LOT of spiritual arguments. That led me to New York (from California).

My second awakening led me to be less argumentative – but that led to harassment. I had to move again.

I am getting ready to enter a time I believe the Lord is “making room” for me. And I will be fruitful in the land. I am trusting this process. I wonder if that is for all of us? Have we been in a fight, digging wells for ourselves that are constantly filled in by those around us who are envious? Do we fight over the well? Or do we just move to the next one?

So – if you have found the well of living water; but are arguing over it with (or facing harassment from) others? Maybe it’s time to move away and dig ANOTHER well – make room. Be fruitful.

The takeaway? Stop fighting.  And THIS is what I want to add to our learning.  Let’s review our lessons over spiritual liberation and freedom:

• The Path of Ascension begins with curiosity and not judgement
• If someone’s curiosity causes doubt and defensiveness, be curious about our own doubt and defensiveness and NOT their motives for curiosity.
• The tree of life is within us. Choose life within with curiosity and not judgment
• Learn to balance the comfort of stumbling, with the challenge of pushing ourselves towards spiritual growth.
• Let go of a stable life. Freedom is accepting “what is” as a blessing. We can’t control what happens. We can only navigate it with bitterness or flow.
• Freedom requires balance – emotions vs intellect, humility vs confidence, thinking as an individual while staying meaningfully connected to others.
• Freedom comes from expansion and not contraction – but contraction is important to the process of expansion
• To live free, we must circumcise the foreskin of past trauma and feel the pain of healing so that our higher selves can appear to us, and we can co-create miraculous NEW life for us and others.
• To be free, we must understand what love requires vs the world around us. 10%.  Just start there. Freedom is seeing the 10% and moving to 11%. Not being trapped by the daunting 90% we feel guilt and shame about.  The 90% is slavery. The 10% is freedom.
• Receive the Universe. Don’t Resist it. This is the path to freedom and liberation.
• We must be vulnerable and ask for the Universe to provide. And. We don’t need to ask because the Universe knows. This is freedom.
• We must accept and receive our role in co-creating moments with Hashem.

Let’s add this:

As we experience wells of living water in our life – the path to slavery is arguing and harassment. Make space. For ourselves and others.  This is spiritual liberation and freedom.  Allowing and making space.  Spreading out.  Expansion. Not contraction.

And – one more thought on this. When you’ve spent your entire life contracting? Spreading out and expanding can feel exhausting.  It may require rest before going. If we’ve spent our life DESCENDING (Toledot) we may need rest before ASCENDING.

Wells of living water.

May THIS be the beautiful concert coming in this month of Kislev. May THIS be the beautiful tapestry coming for us. May this be the BEAUTIFUL painting being painted. May we expand. Spread out. And just trust.

And if the Philistines come to fill in our wells? Just move to the next one. Eventually we will get planted exactly where we need to be.

Those are my thoughts – what are yours?