Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 11 Cheshvan, 5784
Parsha Lekh Lekha: (Genesis 12:1 -17:27) 
Fifth Portion: Genesis 14:21 -15:6

Shema. Listen. Just listen.  Safety. We are safe.

These are the themes of today’s portion.

Let’s dig in.

We have just experienced a war. A battle. Abram and 318 men beat a King that whooped on a major force.  And Abram had the spoils of the war.  What did he do with them?

21And the king of Sodom said to Abram, “Give me the souls, and the possessions take for yourself.”

22And Abram said to the king of Sodom, “I raise my hand to the Lord, the Most High God, Who possesses heaven and earth.

23Neither from a thread to a shoe strap, nor will I take from whatever is yours, that you should not say, ‘I have made Abram wealthy.’

24Exclusive of what the lads ate, and the share of the men who went with me; Aner, Eshkol, and Mamre they shall take their share.”

So the King asked for the souls back, and was cool with letting Abram keep all the material wealth.  That is fascinating isn’t it?

Listen. The King doesn’t desire possessions.

The King desires souls.

What Abram desires; isn’t the King’s possessions.  It’s Hashem.

Abram knows. His safety comes from Hashem.  He doesn’t need an earthly King to make him wealthy.  He does not want to be in debt to any earthly king. He wants all credit to be given to Hashem.

(Pause for reflection)

And. Abram does not require others to live according to HIS principles.

24Exclusive of what the lads ate, and the share of the men who went with me; Aner, Eshkol, and Mamre they shall take their share.”

Abram tells the King, the men “will take their share.”

Abram gives each person sovereignty over their lives.  Abram does not require others to live according to his rules.  He is safe.  His actions demonstrate Abram is safe.

But does he FEEL safe?

Here’s the next part:

1After these incidents, the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, saying, “Fear not, Abram; I am your Shield; your reward is exceedingly great.”

2And Abram said, “O Lord God, what will You give me, since I am going childless, and the steward of my household is Eliezer of Damascus?”

3And Abram said, “Behold, You have given me no seed, and behold, one of my household will inherit me.”

Abram just won a great battle. He was confident. He was safe.  Top of his game.  And yet? We get a sense Abram didn’t FEEL safe at some point after.  Hashem’s words to Abram were “Fear not.”

Listen.  Abram felt unsafe.  And IMMEDIATELY Hashem reminded him.  “I am your Shield.”

Where does Abram’s safety come from? Hashem.

Where does our safety come from? Hashem.

Listen. Shema. The King doesn’t desire possessions.

The King desires souls.

What Abram desires; isn’t the King’s possessions.  It’s Hashem.

Abram knows. His safety comes from Hashem.

If our heart and thoughts are on possessions.  Or even on other’s souls.  We aren’t safe.  If our desire is Hashem? We are safe.

The last part of verse 15:1 is interesting, isn’t it? Hashem tells Abram; “your reward is exceedingly great.”  Abram took his eyes off Hashem it would seem and focused on a reward.  Hashem knew this and was reassuring Abram.

And Abram felt safe.  Safe enough to communicate to Hashem what he desired and needed.  Think about THAT.

Hashem reassured Abram he was safe.  And what did Abram do with this safety? He asked. He communicated a hurt. A wound. He was childless.  He wanted his soul to live on.

And was Hashem’s response “you ungrateful little kid! I just delivered the armies of the greatest king on earth to you! You were safe with me – we had it GOOD! How dare you complain about not having a kid!  What an ungrateful child you are!”

Um. Ok.  There may have been a little bit of my childhood trauma (and adult trauma) in that writing there.

Let’s look at Hashem’s response.  Remember. Hashem started this with “Fear not.”  And Abram trusted he could be open and honest. Share his woundedness. Here’s how Hashem responded (Genesis 15:4-7)

4And behold, the word of the Lord came to him, saying, “This one will not inherit you, but the one who will spring from your innards-he will inherit you.”

5And He took him outside, and He said, “Please look heavenward and count the stars, if you are able to count them.” And He said to him, “So will be your seed.”

6And he believed in the Lord, and He accounted it to him as righteousness.

7And He said to him, “I am the Lord, Who brought you forth from Ur of the Chaldees, to give you this land to inherit it.”

There is NO anger in Hashem’s response. Hashem heard Abram’s woundedness.  His perception of lack.  His desire for a child.  And reassured him; “I got you.”

Listen. We are safe.

Hashem can bring us through the UGLIEST of battles.  He doesn’t stop the battle from happening.  He guides us through it.  He protects us.  So we learn to trust.

And we are safe. We can bring our hurts to Him. We can bring our desires to Him.  And He cares.

This is the path to spiritual freedom and liberation.  And. Abram believed. And THAT is what made Abram right in Hashem’s eyes.

And. I intentionally made a mistake to drive a point home.  Did you even question the connection between verse 6 and 7?  As we would discover tomorrow, verse 7 isn’t in today’s portion. It’s in tomorrows.

7And He said to him, “I am the Lord, Who brought you forth from Ur of the Chaldees, to give you this land to inherit it.”

That is for tomorrow’s portion.  The break is important.  I think the idea of today’s portion ending with this:

6And he believed in the Lord, and He accounted it to him as righteousness.

This is the message.

Shema. Listen. Hashem is safe. Believe. And this? This is what makes us righteous.  Not “being right.”  Listening. Being safe in Hashem.  This is righteousness.  That is all.  All that is needed.  We don’t need to add to this.  We don’t need to subtract.

Shema. Listen.  Hashem brought Abram through a battle. Kept Abram safe.  Abram felt confident. Safe.  And yet? He began to fear. Have desires that were unmet. And it created fear.  And Hashem reassured him. And Abram believed again.  And Abram was safe. This is righteousness.

I am going to say something bold here. Many may challenge me.

Safety? Is righteousness. Understanding we are safe?  That is right.  Our mission. Our purpose. Is to be in touch with our own safety. To trust. To believe. AND to inspire others to understand they are safe. And to support others on their journey of safety.  This is the heart.

Babies are born and need their parents to provide safety.  The struggle from childhood to adulthood?  Learning to be safe. Many adults I know don’t feel safe. Maybe they feel safe with their possessions. Maybe they feel safe clinging to a future they believe in. Or a past (Al Bundy scored 4 touchdowns in High School, don’t you know?  Married with Children reference FTW).

Our journey here on this earth is a journey of safety.  Where does our safety come from?

Hashem.

And. Understanding. Hashem is in each of us.  He has gifted us with His Neshama.  And our life journey is connecting our body and mind to our soul.  Our inner source of safety. Hashem cares about our Neshama. We are safe.

What are your thoughts?

Here are my thoughts from the past two years:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for Heshvan 9, 5783

I’m really meditating on the idea of safety. And how often our brains and bodies don’t feel safe and we don’t even recognize it.

We go far down the road of fight or flight (or freeze) before we can emotionally regulate ourselves to come back to a place of internal power, sovereignty, and safety.

I’m also reflecting on how this often comes after a big victory in our lives. I’ll feel free and liberated, and then I go to a place of feeling unsafe. That’s something to chew on.

Many have commented lately how happy my Facebook posts have been; how much joy they see as I am living my best life.

And they would be right. Whereas before, 90% of my life was a struggle and 10% was joy – and was able to post occasional things on Facebook about joy and keep the struggle to myself, I’m now living a much more authentic life.

Life is tough. There are pieces that are exhausting. And a lot of it are things where I struggle to feel safe. To trust.

And yet all the data in my life shows things continue to work out. For my good. And yet, I still doubt. Like Abram being worried; I worry.

But then my mind shifts to safety. The truth is; in this moment. I’m safe. I’m worried about a future moment and feeling unsafe now because of my brain’s ability to freak me out.

We can trust. We can hope. We can live.

And that is my thought from todays portion!

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 8 Heshvan, 5782

In today’s portion, we learned about Abram and the King of Sodom. The king wanted his people back (that Abram had rescued from Chedorlaomer) but offered to let Abram take all the possessions for himself.

Abram’s response was to focus on Hashem; he wasn’t going to take even a shoelace or thread because it was Gods doing. This was a miracle – remember 318 men defeated an army that defeated five kings. Abram knew this was God’s doing and didn’t want to take the spoils of what Hashem did.

Yet. He also allowed people he was with to take their share.

Rabbi Israel Meir Kagan (in the 19-20th century) wrote;

“Abram refused to take any reward for himself, but did not force this stringency on his colleagues. They deserved their share of the spoils. There is an important lesson to be learned here. Be especially critical of your own actions, but not when it comes to those of other people.”

Wow. How often do we (I) get this wrong? When it comes to Jewish practice, how often do we judge others for what they are (or not) doing? Even worse; I judge those doing more Jewish things than me and ASSUMING they are judging me for doing less!

How do I wrestle with this idea? I think it comes down to the idea of control. I like things being put in boxes. There are Jews who do more than I, there are Jews who do less. There is somehow comfort in that concept; even though it’s totally bunk.

As my friend Rabbi  Meir points out often; “there are no good Jews or bad Jews, only Jews!” I struggle to ground myself in that reality on the daily. Even with my kids.

So. Moving forward. How did Hashem respond to Abram forgoing the spoils of war?

Hashem gave Abram a vision. He told Abram he would protect him. He doubled down in telling Abram he was safe. (Hold on to this for a little bit later) Hashem was going to reward Abram!

Abram almost complains to God in response. He complains Hashem has not provided any children. Hashem tells him children are coming from Abram, and they will be numerous.

And. Abram believed in God (the Talmud adds “without asking for a sign”) and Hashem considered this an act of righteousness!

Going back, considering the stars. Not only are the stars numerous, as Rabbi Joseph Saul Nathanson points out, when viewed from earth they are small and almost insignificant- but when viewed from the heavens they are great and mighty!

I had never really considered this juxtaposition before. Hashem called it; (as Rabbi Nathanson points out); Abram’s descendants will be treated as small and insignificant down on earth, but when viewed from heaven we are considered great and noble! Wow!

In addition, Hashem reminded Abram he was safe. Hashem was his shield. How much do we need to know we are safe, especially given what is happening around us.

I’m learning a lot these days about trauma and the impact on our brains. Trauma brains constantly live in a state of fear and survival. Even the smallest threat can be perceived as big when viewed through a trauma brain.

Yet Hashem is our shield. He protects us. We are safe. Do we believe (like Abram)?

Where are we feeling unsafe in our own lives? Where do we need to hear Hashem tell us “Don’t be afraid (insert your name here)! I am your shield!”

Maybe we feel undeserving of Hashem’s shield. Maybe we feel like we have done things wrong and made too many mistakes to have Hashem as our shield. But considering Abram pawned his wife off as his sister and lived in fear at times, there should be some comfort here for us. Hashem is our shield. We are indeed safe!

Thoughts? I love when y’all engage! Do you have questions? Insights? Challenges? Things I missed? Leave them below!