Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 19 Cheshvan, 5785
Today’s portion is all about trusting the universe to unfold as it should. This quote jumps out at me:
“Suffering is caused by the contrast between what you mentally decided you wanted and the reality unfolding in front of you.” – Mark Nepo
This is all too real.
And? I am realizing? What I mentally decided yesterday and what I mentally decided a year ago and what I mentally decided five years ago? All different. And the reality unfolding in front of me in a moment? May cause suffering in one of those mental decisions – and at the same time bring me closer to another mental decision I had previously abandoned.
And with that. That is the lesson.
What are your thoughts?
Here are my thoughts from last year:
Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 24 Cheshvan, 5784
Parsha Hayyei Sarah: (Genesis 23:1 -25:18)
Fourth Portion: Genesis 24:27 – 24:52
Today’s portion is really interesting – and looking at my reflections over the past two years when reading this portion, there is something about it that seems to connect to the Mikveh – which those of you who are not Jewish may understand better as a “baptismal.” It’s a pool of water Jews dip in for various reasons – for women it’s connected to their period and birth. For men, it’s more to spiritually cleanse and/or when they have a spiritual awakening. Read more here:
Mikveh for Women:
https://www.chabad.org/theJewishWoman/article_cdo/aid/1541/jewish/The-Mikvah.htm
Mikveh for men:
So this idea seems significant as we enter into today’s portion:
27And he said, “Blessed is the Lord, the God of my master, Abraham, Who has not forsaken His loving kindness and His truth from my master. As for me, the Lord led me on the road to the house of my master’s kinsmen.”
28And the maiden ran, and she told her mother’s house what had happened.
29Now Rebecca had a brother whose name was Laban, and Laban ran to the man outside, to the fountain.
30And it came to pass, when he saw the nose ring and the bracelets on his sister’s hands, and when he heard the words of his sister Rebecca, saying, “So did the man speak to me, ” that he came to the man, and behold, he was standing over the camels at the fountain.
31And he said, “Come, you who are blessed of the Lord. Why should you stand outside, when I have cleared the house, and a place for the camels?”
32So the man came to the house and unmuzzled the camels, and he gave straw and fodder to the camels and water to wash his feet and the feet of the men who were with him.
Remember – the context for this was Abraham’s servant seeing Rebecca fulfill what was put into the Universe with Hashem.
Let’s keep going. Rebecca’s family welcomes the servant with open arms. But before the servant partakes – he needs to recount the entire story:
33And [food] was set before him to eat, but he said, “I will not eat until I have spoken my words.” And he said, “Speak.”
34And he said, “I am Abraham’s servant.
35And the Lord blessed my master exceedingly, and he became great, and He gave him sheep and cattle, silver and gold, man servants and maid servants, camels and donkeys.
36And Sarah, my master’s wife, bore a son to my master after she had become old, and he gave him all that he possesses.
37And my master adjured me, saying, ‘You shall not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, in whose land I dwell.
38Instead, you must go to my father’s house and to my family, and take a wife for my son.’
39And I said to my master, ‘Perhaps the woman will not follow me?’
40And he said to me, ‘The Lord, before Whom I walked, will send His angel with you and make your way prosper, and you shall take a wife for my son from my family and from my father’s house.
41You will then be absolved from my oath, when you come to my family, and if they do not give [her] to you, you will be absolved from my oath.’
42So I came today to the fountain, and I said, ‘O Lord, God of my master Abraham, if You desire to prosper my way upon which I am going
43Behold, I am standing by the water fountain. When a maiden comes out to draw [water], I will say to her, ‘Please, give me a little water to drink from your pitcher.’
44And [if] she will say to me, ‘You too may drink, and I will also draw water for your camels,’ she is the woman whom the Lord has designated for my master’s son.’
45I had not yet finished speaking thus in my heart, and behold, Rebecca came out with her pitcher on her shoulder, and she went down to the fountain and drew water, and I said to her, ‘Please give me to drink.’
46And she hastened and lowered her pitcher from upon her, and she said, ‘Drink, and I will also water your camels.’ So I drank, and she also watered the camels.
47And I asked her, and I said, ‘Whose daughter are you?’ And she replied, ‘The daughter of Bethuel the son of Nahor, whom Milcah bore to him.’ And I placed the nose ring on her nose and the bracelets on her hands.
48And I kneeled and prostrated myself to the Lord, and I blessed the Lord, the God of my master Abraham, Who led me on the true path, to take the daughter of my master’s brother for his son.
49And now, if you will do loving kindness and truth with my master, tell me, and if not, tell me, and I will turn to the right or to the left.”
This was important for everyone to know what Hashem was doing up until this point. They needed to understand this wasn’t just a person making things up – this was Hashem directing this. How will the family react? How would WE react? Especially a stranger coming to ask to take one of our family members away from us?
50And Laban and Bethuel answered and said, “The matter has emanated from the Lord. We cannot speak to you either bad or good.
51Behold Rebecca is before you, take [her] and go, and let her be a wife for your master’s son, as the Lord has spoken.”
52Now it came to pass when Abraham’s servant heard their words, that he prostrated himself on the ground to the Lord.
Wow! This is a little surprising no? They basically accepted this as being from Hashem. The servant was thrilled. He prostrated himself before Hashem. What a joyous moment!
And. I know what comes next. But for a moment, let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
In this particular moment – it would seem that EVERYTHING is going according to Abraham and his servants’ plan. Joy abounds.
I will share something from my journaling this morning that we need to consider – which will sound odd in the context of this moment of the story.
It’s from the “Book of Awakening” by Mark Nepo. And he writes this:
“Suffering is caused by the contrast between what you mentally decided you wanted and the reality unfolding in front of you.”
In this moment – what Abraham’s servant mentally decided he wanted, and what was unfolding? Matched. But I think we are going to see things take a turn.
My takeaway – sometimes we get ahead of ourselves. The servant was excited here because the family verbally agreed to let Rebecca go. But they haven’t left yet, have they? How often do we see “signs” moving us in the direction of what we mentally decided we wanted, and just believed it would continue to unfold that way? Or vice versa? All we know in THIS moment – the servant was seeing it all unfold according to his desires and wants. He was NOT suffering.
This – in a sense – reminds us of the lesson from yesterday, doesn’t it?
We must accept and receive our role in co-creating moments with Hashem. Are we the one asking? Are we the one being asked? Who are we asking to co-create with us? Who is asking us to co-create with them? THIS is the life of Sarah – and THIS is freedom and liberation.
In this moment – the servant was co-creating with Abraham and Hashem. And it would seem Laban and Bethuel were willing co-creators as well. I am interested to see how this progresses!
What are your thoughts?
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