Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 19 Shevat, 5785

Good morning! We are starting another work week, and the Parsha this week seems to be giving us consequences for our reactions.  It would see the desire is for us to recognize how anxiety can be something that can do far more damage than we experienced while in slavery.

In fact, that is a significant part of freedom – navigating anxiety.

Because we need to make our own decisions.

I watched “Captain America: Brave New Worlds” last night and loved it.  Without spoilers, it really does play with this theme of freedom connected to anxiety. Things are a lot less “ensured” when we are free.

And? What is interesting about today’s portion? We are literally connecting to the avengers.

This is an idea centered around justice.

Our anxiety can do damage. And one of the lessons is both grace and responsibility for our own anxiety.

And? In some ways, our society today is built much more to trigger our own anxieties than the past – and in some ways much less.

Because today? Our anxiety is not centered on physical survival. It’s more emotional survival. And anxiety is an emotional state.

Navigating our anxiety – by being tender AND taking responsibility for it? Is the move. Which is why the ending of Captain America last night? Brought me to tears.

I highly recommend.

These are my thoughts – what are yours?

Here are my thoughts from last year:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 26 Shevat 5784
Parsha Mishpatim: (Exodus 21:1 – 24:18)
Second Portion: Exodus 21:20 – 22:3

Good morning! This morning I am going to catch us up on the first two portions of this weeks’ Parsha.  This Parsha is Mishpatim, which means “laws.” Which is interesting since the Torah itself often gets interpreted as “laws.”  These are the laws given after the 10 commandments. And it is unique that the parsha STARTS with the word “And.” It connects this portion to Jethro. I wonder if that is ALSO because Jethro is still the impetus here? 

1And these are the ordinances that you shall set before them.

2Should you buy a Hebrew slave, he shall work [for] six years, and in the seventh [year], he shall go out to freedom without charge.

3If he comes [in] alone, he shall go out alone; if he is a married man, his wife shall go out with him.

4If his master gives him a wife, and she bears him sons or daughters, the woman and her children shall belong to her master, and he shall go out alone.

5But if the slave says, “I love my master, my wife, and my children. I will not go free,”

6his master shall bring him to the judges, and he shall bring him to the door or to the doorpost, and his master shall bore his ear with an awl, and he shall serve him forever.

This first part is all about Hebrew slavery. The Children in Israel – after LEAVING Slavery in Egypt – somehow must have found a way to become enslaved again.

My guess? It had to do with not staying connected to the Torah; remember – on Saturday, we read what Hashem wants:

• Make an Altar to Hashem
• Slaughter the things we are holding onto
• Receive Hashem’s blessing
• The Altar should be natural
• Dignity

This is freedom and relationship. Transformational love. It is interesting that immediately, Hashem and Moses begin the ordinances when we find ourselves enslaved.  Because of fear.

I have been doing a meditation practice around anxiety.  In the 10%  Happier app, I am learning about anxiety –

“The State of Uneasiness and Apprehension about future Uncertainties.”

Simply put – Anxiety is overestimating a potential threat or underestimating our ability to cope with this threat.

Anxiety causes us to react quickly and not respond in wisdom or discernment. It would seem these verses are all about what to do AFTER we fall into the trap of anxiety. Let’s keep going:

7Now if a man sells his daughter as a maidservant, she shall not go free as the slaves go free.

8If she is displeasing to her master, who did not designate her [for himself], then he shall enable her to be redeemed; he shall not rule over her to sell her to another person, when he betrays her.

9And if he designates her for his son, he shall deal with her according to the law of the daughters [of Israel].

10If he takes another [wife] for himself, he shall not diminish her sustenance, her clothing, or her marital relations.

11And if he does not do these three things for her, she shall go free without charge, without [payment of] money.

Reading this passage creates a lot of feelings. I can judge these passages as treating women like property. And I can also see how this is a result of anxiety. How the Children of Israel navigated Anxiety.  Which I imagine there was a lot of. 

Coming out of slavery, living in the wilderness. I would imagine there was a lot of people who were experiencing “The State of Uneasiness and Apprehension about future Uncertainties.” And overestimating potential threats, and underestimating their ability to handle threats.

It would seem as we move from grief, we get to anxiety, doesn’t it? Getting out of Egypt requires grief. Moving into the wilderness, there is a lot of anxiety it would seem. Let’s keep going.

12One who strikes a man so that he dies shall surely be put to death.

13But one who did not stalk [him], but God brought [it] about into his hand, I will make a place for you to which he shall flee.

14But if a man plots deliberately against his friend to slay him with cunning, [even] from My altar you shall take him to die.

15And one who strikes his father or his mother shall surely be put to death.

This section is interesting. If anxiety causes someone to kill someone (“God brought it about into his hand”) there is still freedom.  But if you PLOT it out? That’s worthy of death.

And this also seems to bring a nuance to one of the 10 commandments, doesn’t it?

I am reflecting on how anxiety impacts our ability to see nuance.

Lets keep going

16And whoever kidnaps a man and sells him, and he is found in his possession, shall surely be put to death.

17And one who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death.

18And if men quarrel, and one strikes the other with a stone or with a fist, and he does not die but is confined to [his] bed,

19if he gets up and walks about outside on his support, the assailant shall be cleared; he shall give only [payment] for his [enforced] idleness, and he shall provide for his cure.

The first portion seems to close with a similar theme – kidnapping someone requires plotting. In an argument, when anxiety would be raised, and you overestimate a threat? You are clear. You just need to provide for care.

So it would seem AFTER giving us the 10 commandments, the Torah seems to be focusing on our anxiety, doesn’t it?

Ok – let’s look at the second portion:

Second Portion: Exodus 21:20 – 22:3

20And should a man strike his manservant or his maidservant with a rod, and [that one] die under his hand, he shall surely be avenged.

21But if he survives for a day or for two days, he shall not be avenged, because he is his property.

So – even though we read about servants and how to treat humans – even ones who are “possessions” to a man, we see the Torah here CLEARLY viewing these slaves as human. A master striking his manservant and maidservant with a rod? Worthy of death. 

22And should men quarrel and hit a pregnant woman, and she miscarries but there is no fatality, he shall surely be punished, when the woman’s husband makes demands of him, and he shall give [restitution] according to the judges’ [orders].

23But if there is a fatality, you shall give a life for a life,

24an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a hand for a hand, a foot for a foot,

25a burn for a burn, a wound for a wound, a bruise for a bruise.

So. This is interesting isn’t it? Quarreling – connects to anxiety. And if that anxiety causes a pregnant woman to miscarry – but the woman survives? There is financial restitution for that. 

It is CLEAR we are responsible for what we do in our anxiety. Anxiety is NOT an excuse. However, there is some grace for anxiety. The Torah acknowledges unsafe fear (how I would define anxiety) has consequences.

And. If a pregnant woman is KILLED by anxiety? We get the famous passage – Eye for an eye.

And. It is INTERESTING this is connected to a pregnant woman, isn’t it? Why?

My reflection is on the value of a woman who is in the process of manifesting something – we think babies. But what if a woman is working on manifesting something like a home. If the home is destroyed, that’s one thing. But if the woman/womb is destroyed (or even damaged?) that is different!

Pregnant women in the Torah are REVERED – because they are in the process of creation.

My takeaway? Let’s keep anxiety away from pregnant woman. I wonder if that is because that anxiety gets transmuted to the child/manifestation.  Something to reflect on.

26And if a man strikes the eye of his manservant or the eye of his maidservant and destroys it, he shall set him free in return for his eye,

27and if he knocks out the tooth of his manservant or the tooth of his maidservant, he shall set him free in return for his tooth.

We go from pregnant women to manservant/maidservants.  The person hurting them? Doesn’t need to lose an eye. They are just called to set them free. That is fascinating!

28And if a bull gores a man or a woman and [that one] dies, the bull shall surely be stoned, and its flesh shall not be eaten, and the owner of the bull is clear.

29But if it is a [habitually] goring bull since yesterday and the day before yesterday, and its owner had been warned, but he did not guard it, and it puts to death a man or a woman, the bull shall be stoned, and also its owner shall be put to death,

30insofar as ransom shall be levied upon him, he shall give the redemption of his soul according to all that is levied upon him.

31Or if it gores a young boy or a young girl, according to this ordinance shall be done to him.

So again – we get an “accidental” goring – the bull is responsible – the bull dies. But the owner is cleared.

HOWEVER. If the owner was warned? And someone is killed? The owner is responsible to the point of death.

I reflect here – there is grace with anxiety – but there is ALSO responsibility. We have the responsibility for creating safety for others – especially if we are aware of a threat.

Now, the Torah sees a difference with manservants and maidservants:

32If the bull gores a manservant or a maidservant, he shall give silver [in the amount of] thirty shekels to his master, and the bull shall be stoned.

33And if a person opens a pit, or if a person digs a pit and does not cover it, and a bull or a donkey falls into it,

34the owner of the pit shall pay; he shall return money to its owner, and the dead body shall be his.

35And if a man’s bull strikes his friend’s bull and it dies, they shall sell the live bull and divide the money received for it, and they shall also divide the dead body.

36Or if it was known that it was a [habitually] goring bull since yesterday and the day before yesterday, and its owner does not watch it, he shall surely pay a bull for a bull, and the dead body shall be his.

So we see – the owner of the bull (or the creator of the pit) is responsible for what happens.

Anxiety, it would seem, is not an excuse. We are responsible for our anxiety – thought we are less responsible than if we act in our safety. Plotting from a place of safety is different than reacting out of anxiety.

37If a man steals a bull or a lamb and slaughters it or sells it, he shall pay five cattle for the bull or four sheep for the lamb.

22:1If, while breaking in, the thief is discovered, and he is struck and dies, [it is as if] he has no blood.

2If the sun shone upon him, [it is as if] he has blood; he shall surely pay. If he has no [money], he shall be sold for his theft.

3If the stolen article is found in his possession whether a bull, a donkey, or a lamb live ones, he shall pay twofold.

We close this passage with theft. A thief who gets away with it? Owes 5x or 4x what he stole. A thief in the night who is found and is killed? No blood on anyone’s hands. If he makes it through the night? He will pay. If the thief can’t pay? He will be sold for his theft. This is an indicator on the conditions someone would become a slave.

Ok. So the big takeaways today?

Anxiety is real. Our freedom from slavery will produce anxiety. How we navigate that anxiety is crucial. We are responsible for our behavior in our anxiety. And. There is also grace in our anxiety.

Those are my thoughts. What are yours?