Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 3 Iyar, 5783. 18th Day of the Omer.

The portrait here was done at the SHIFT fair yesterday by an amazing energy artist, Leiah Bowden.  It is my sacral chakra driving energy into my heart chakra.  This is completely opposite of the drawing she did in the Fall for me, where my heart chakra was pouring into my Solar Plexus Chakra.  I am encouraged by the transition of how my energy is flowing.  It is much more grounded and rooted in creativity – which is what I have been working on.  That is where creativity resides – in the sacral chakra.

The SHIFT fair was an amazing experience.  My first vendor experience as a Reiki practitioner.  The themes of the clients I saw was around strength, understanding, clarity, and harmony.  My take away (as a practitioner we receive energy as well) is that understanding where our strength residence will bring clarity and harmony internally – and that will bring equanimity to those around us as well.

Let’s dig into the theme of the Omer today!

Today’s Theme is “Netztach of Tiferet” which translates to “Determination” or “Enduring” of Tiferet.

From Chabad:

Is my compassion enduring and consistent? Is it reliable or whimsical? Does it prevail among other forces in my life? Do I have the capacity to be compassionate even when I’m busy with other activities or only when it’s comfortable for me? Am I ready to stand up and fight for another?

Exercise for the day: In middle of the busy day take a moment and call someone that needs a compassionate word. Defend someone who is in need of sympathy even if it’s not a popular position.

As I reflect on this, I am aware of how the limits of my determination and endurance for compassion are bounded by how determined I am willing to be compassionate towards myself.  If I am overly critical of myself, if I am unkind to myself – with my internal self talk, it will be hard to sustain any kind of compassion for others.  The amount of internal judgment and condemnation is going to make it challenging to be kind and compassionate for others.  If I won’t fight for myself out of love (instead of fighting out of a trauma, survival or fear response – which is very different) how can I fight for someone else out of love?

Let’s dig into today’s portion(s).  I think it will connect!

We start by looking into the Yom Kippur Sacrifice.  This year, Yom Kippur starts at sundown on September 24th.  It is the 10th of Tishrei.

What strikes me about this portion is how the idea of compassion, kindness, and determination (i think?) begin with this idea of forgiveness.  If we cannot forgive ourselves and let go of the past (which we no longer have any control over because those moments are all stored as data in the collective consciousness around us – those who witnessed or were impacted by our transgression) then how can we truly be determined to love ourselves and others?  If we won’t let go of our transgressions – why do we think we can let go of others?

I share all the time – the only control we really have is this moment.  What happened yesterday? It’s done. It’s not real.  It only lives as a created reality inside our minds.  It ALSO lives as a created reality inside the minds who experienced the moments with us.  AND it also lives as a reality inside the minds who experienced those moments in different parts of the world.

And. I have power.  To redefine the reality in my head.  Some of us create cognitive blocks in order to survive past trauma.    Some redefine the moment to find a way to be positive about it and ignore any real feelings of anger or sadness.  But we do have that power.

But the fulcrum of the true power we have?  Forgiveness. Atonement.  This is why it is so important to be determined to let go of the past.  We cannot do that by ignoring it.  We can only let go by engaging with those moments. Going back in time inside our own heads – and then releasing the energy we’ve held onto.  And then we can come to a better place of understanding and clarity in THIS moment. And take action.  To respond. Not react.  To observe. Not absorb.

Then we can be determined to love ourselves.

What are your thoughts?

Here is the commentary I wrote a year ago on these passages:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 11 Nisan, 5782

Today we finish up learning about the sacrifice during Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. Yesterday we left off with Aaron changing his clothes from entering the Holy of holies and offering up the first goat on the alter, and then laying his hands and casting the sin of the people onto the second goat – sending it off to the desert with a designated man. After changing his clothes and immersing himself, he would then offer up two rams; one for himself and one for the people at the altar.

Todays portion begins with the final instruction for that ram sacrifice – Aaron should make the day of the sin offering go up in smoke on the outer altar.

It is interesting the portion splits the ram offering between the killing of the ram and then the fire of the ram; having it go up in smoke. I’m reflecting on why that might be split that way. I’m not sure I have good answers; if any of you have an idea, I’d love to hear it!

Next we turn to the scape goat. Hashem tells Moses that the person who sent off the make goat to the high cliff (killing the scape goat) should immerse his garments and body in the mikveh – and only then may he come into the camp.

Then we see God tell Moses someone should clean up the sin offering bull and goat of the sin offering; the skin, flesh and waste matter should be burned outside the camp. That person should ALSO immerse themselves before coming back to the camp.

The idea of purity and how death (even Animal death for the purpose of sacrifice) was a matter of purity is interesting. The animals have value here; because their death – even prior to dying (as the example of the person who brings the scape goat to the cliff to kill) has value. I think this is an important thing to chew on and consider.

The portion concludes with more about Yom Kippur.

Hashem says; “The Day of Atonement will be an eternal statute for you.”

Now let’s stop here. What does “eternal” mean?

From the Oxford dictionary; “lasting or existing forever; without end or beginning.”

If the Day of Atonement is an eternal statute, I have questions.

1. What happens when the temple is destroyed? Do we still celebrate it?
2. Who should celebrate it? Those who are Jewish? Or should all of us be celebrating – anyone who worships the God of Abaraham Isaac and Jacob?

Let’s see what the Torah says;

1. On the tenth day of the seventh month you should afflict yourselves.
2. You should not do any work- neither native nor convert who lives among you. Why? The Torah answers why;

– for on this day God will atone for you, to cleanse you. You will be cleansed from all your sins before God.

Maimonides writes; “The day ITSELF brings atonement – but it will only be effective for those who are remorseful.”

Rabbi Schneur Zalman writes;

“Repentance has the power of retroactivity. Although the past is no longer under your prerogative, nevertheless, God, who transcends the categories of time and limitation, has endowed repentance with a special and wonderful quality through which you can regain mastery over your past. By means of this special power of repentance, you are able not only to render the past neutral and ineffective, you can even reverse it and turn it into something positive. – as the Sages said: “Willful wrongs become as though they were merits” (Babylonian Talmud)

Interesting thoughts on Yom Kippur.

There is still more to be written though. The portion closes with more about Yom Kippur:

3. It is a sabbath of rest for you; and you should afflict yourselves. It is an eternal statute.
4. Only the High Priest who is anointed or one who is inaugurated to serve in his fathers place should carry out this atonement. Only he should don the linen garments, the holy garments, go into the holy of holies, etc

The portion ends with Hashem saying once again; “This will be an eternal statute for you, to atone for the Jewish people, for all their sins, once a year.”

Remember – the day itself is what atones. Just because there is no temple, does not mean we don’t celebrate Yom Kippur!!!

We see a conclusion that Aaron did exactly what God commanded him to do through Moses, in the correct order.

My takeaway here is the importance of repentance towards forgiveness from Hashem. This is for all of us. On this holy day, that for 2022 falls at sundown on October 4th (10th of Tishrei); we should be thinking about forgiveness. What are the areas we need as a community to ask Hashem’s forgiveness for?

But we also can experience this forgiveness daily on an individual level. What regrets do we have where we need Hashem’s forgiveness so we can move on with freedom and liberation and not be weighed down by our past?

I encourage all of us to reflect on this as we make our way towards Passover on Friday evening at sundown. May this discussion of Yom Kippur remind us that we experience the slavery of our sin; and yet Hashem wants us to experience freedom as we are forgiven! May this year, during Passover, may we not only remember the story of the Jews leading Egypt; but may we experience in our hearts, the regrets, shame, and guilt that weigh us down be removed so we can live free lives to love Hashem and one another!

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 12 Nisan, 5782

Good morning! Todays portion is very short, and focuses on offering sacrifices outside the temple.

God tells Moses to speak to Aaron and his sons the following:

1. Any man of the house of Israel who slaughters an ox, lamb, or goat which has been sanctified as an offering inside the camp but outside the temple courtyard, or one who slaughters outside the camp and does not bring the offering to the entrance of the Tent of meeting as an offering to God in the presence of the tabernacle of God – this act will be counted for that man like shedding the blood of a human being.
2. If a man sprinkles sacrificial blood outside the temple, he is punished as if he has shed human blood and that man will be cut off from among his people.

Wow. So. Up until now, it may have felt like animals were getting a raw deal out of life in Israel. But this verse explains that animals serve a function- sacrifices. And to kill an animal outside of its purpose is akin to murder. That’s a big shift from what has been in my head until now.

Second, we are back on the theme of offering sacrifices to God that he doesn’t want. We’ve discussed this previously – if I bring a vegan friend a pound of steak, that is going to be seen poorly by my vegan friend. It isn’t always the act of sacrificing or gifting that matters. What matters is whether what we are sacrificing is what the other person in our life WANTS. That requires knowing them and having a relationship with them.

These passages really bring clarity to these points (in my opinion).

In addition, Rabbi Hayyim of Tchernowitz writes the following:

These words (in verse 17:4), “in the presence of the Tabernacle of God,” seem redundant, as the verse just stated that he “does not bring (his offering) to the entrance of the Tent of Meeting to offer up as an offering to God”

People often do what they are supposed to, but they do it for their own sake. They miss a vital ingredient: they neither make God’s “presence” felt in their actions, nor do they act because it is right.

It is this error that our verse attempts to forewarn. Every command should be carried out

amid the heightened awareness that we are “in the presence of the Tabernacle of God” (end quote)

This is crucial. We must remember we are always in his presence!

The portion closes with “why?” We should do this. Hashem designed the sacrificial process to take place at the tabernacle. The last line of the portion gives us more context and clarity; “They should no longer slaughter their sacrifices to demons after whom they stray. This should be an eternal statute for them, for all their generations.”

So basically this applies to us today; we must be careful who we sacrifice to!

What are your thoughts?