Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 4 Iyar, 5784 –Day 19 of Omer
Parsha ‘Emor – “Speak” (Leviticus 21:1 – 24:23)
First Portion: Leviticus 21:1 – 21:15

Good afternoon! What a morning of reflection I’ve had. I apologize for the lateness of Torah thoughts today! Let’s start with the Omer!

Today is Day 19 of the Omer:  Today’s theme is the Humility of Compassion:

From Chabad:

Compassion must include humility for it not to be condescending and pretentious. Hod is recognizing that my ability to be compassionate and giving does not make me better than the recipient; it is the acknowledgement and appreciation that by creating one who needs compassion G‑d gave me the gift of being able to bestow compassion. Thus there is no place for haughtiness in compassion. Do I feel superior because I am compassionate? Do I look down at those that need my compassion? Am I humble and thankful to G‑d for giving me the ability to have compassion for others?

Exercise for the day: Express compassion in an anonymous fashion, not taking any personal credit.

One of my takeaways here is that our compassion must not be from a place of arrogance. We must not see ourselves as “better” when we have opportunities to be compassionate. We can get side tracked because we don’t show compassion within.  When we are offering compassion for others we can see within us where we may need to show ourselves compassion at the same time! This is crucial so that we don’t feel haughty in our ego.

Today we start a NEW parsha! Parshat ‘Emor – which means “Speak” I wrote this a few years ago, and it comes from the Chumash I am reading. This is crucial:

“’Emor means ‘Speak to the children and educate them.’ More precisely it means to speak softly. A teacher must bond with their students, giving them the feeling that here is a teacher who cares whether they understand the material or not.”

One of the things I’ve noticed is how often we SPEAK and we do not listen.  I take this all within. Do I speak softly to my self? Is my inner dialogue kind and gentle as I am working on myself? Do I care whether I understand the material I am learning or not? Or am I anxious about learning? This is the compassion within.  When we speak to ourselves, can we speak kindness and love? Let’s dig into the Torah and see what the Torah says:

1And the Lord said to Moses: Speak to the kohanim, the sons of Aaron, and say to them: Let none [of you] defile himself for a dead person among his people

2except for his relative who is close to him, his mother, his father, his son, his daughter, his brother,

3and for his virgin sister who is close to him, who was not [yet] with a man for her, he shall defile himself.

So let’s start with WHO this is addressed to.  The Priests.  This was not for all of Israel. The Torah is wanting to keep the Priests from touching a dead body. The exceptions made are for close family member. What is interesting is the virgin sister. The idea is that when a woman marries a man, she leaves her family obligations and attaches herself to her husband’s family obligations.  That is interesting for sure! Let’s keep going:

4[But] a husband shall not defile himself for [a wife who causes] his desecration, [while she is] among his people.

5They shall not make bald patches on their heads, nor shall they shave the edge of their beard, nor shall they make cuts in their flesh.

6They shall be holy to their God, and they shall not desecrate their God’s Name, for they offer up the fire offerings of the Lord, the food offering of their God, so they shall be holy.

So the Priests could marry according to this. And – they were not to cause self harm.

7They shall not marry a woman who is a prostitute or who is desecrated, and they shall not marry a woman who is divorced from her husband for he [the kohen] is holy to his God.

8You shall sanctify him, for he offers up the food offering of your God; he shall be holy to you, for I, the Lord Who sanctifies you, am holy.

Again, we are talking purely about the sons of Aaron – the priests. This was not for everyone.

9If a kohen’s daughter becomes desecrated through adultery she desecrates her father; she shall be burned in fire.

So on one hand, this feels really harsh. On the other? It’s meant to be a warning for the Priests. It is also likely a reason why priests may NOT have married. Because this would be a tough pill to swallow.

10And the kohen who is elevated above his brothers, upon whose head the anointment oil has been poured or who has been inaugurated to wear the garments he shall not leave his hair unshorn or rend his garments.

11And he shall not come upon any dead bodies; he shall not defile himself for his father or his mother.

12He shall not leave the Sanctuary, and he will not desecrate the holy things of his God, for the crown of his God’s anointing oil is upon him. I am the Lord.

Again the Priests were more separated than the rest of the children of Israel.

13He shall marry a woman in her virgin state.

14A widow, a divorcee, a woman who is desecrated or a prostitute he shall not marry [any] of these. Only a virgin of his people may he take as a wife.

15And he shall not desecrate his offspring among his people, for I am the Lord, Who sanctifies him.

So. There you have it. The question becomes; are we priests? Are we called to follow this? I think that is likely up to us, right? If I want to live as a priest, I need to accept these expectations.

What are your thoughts?

Here are my thoughts from two years ago:

Tyler’s Torah Thoughts for 7 Iyar, 5782.

Today is the 22nd day of the Omer – 3 weeks and 1 day of the Omer. This week’s theme is “determination.” As we move from compassion into determination – may the week ahead bring confidence and joy as we set our intentions and follow through!

This morning, while reading the “Book of Awakening” by Mark Nepo, I came across this that helped me get into a good space around determination:

“As long as we see what has come to pass as being unfair, we’ll be a prisoner of what might have been.”

I offer what has surprised me in my pain: that life is not fair, but unending in its capacity to change us; that compassion is fair and feeling is just; and that we are not responsible for all that befalls us, only for how we receive it and for how we hold each other up along the way.” (End quote)

If we are holding onto the things we feel are unfair, May we learn Torah and use these parts of our lives to change us. May we receive what we are given and hold one another up along our journeys!!!

Let’s dig in!

This weeks Parsha is ‘Emor which means “speak.”

The Chumash I’m reading expands on this: Emor means “speak to the children and educate them.” More precisely it means to speak softly.

We start the portion with mitzvahs specifically directed towards the priests.

1. Priests shouldn’t become ritually impure through contact with a dead body- when there are others who can tend to the burial.
2. The exception to the mitzvah above is when the priest’s wife, who is his closest relative, his mom or dad, his son, his daughter, his brother, his virgin sister died. He must make himself ritually impure to bury them.

Ok stop. Let’s ask the question – why no “non-virgin” sister? That seems problematic.

And it might be. But I also reflect on the culture at the time; that the woman’s husband would be the one to become ritually impure instead of the priest. The idea was only when needed should the priest become ritually impure.

That’s my thought. I could be wrong though. I’d love other thoughts.

Next:

3. A husband should not make himself ritually impure for a wife who violated his sacred character (because as a priest, he was forbidden to Marry her). However this only applies if there are others to do the burial.
4. The priests should not make bald patches on their heads as a sign of mourning

Interesting visual of Monks for me as it seems like there is an intention there to do the opposite of this.

5. Priests should not shave the extremities of their beards
6. They should not make scratches in their flesh.
7. Even against their will, the court may force priests to be holy to their God.

Wait. Hold up. How can you force someone to be holy? Rabbi Abraham Samuel Benjamin Sofer writes this:

The verse reads literally, “You should sanctify him, for he offers up the food -offering of your God” You learn here that a man’s sanctity does not necessarily depend on his intelligence or righteousness; it comes because God gives him sacred tasks to fulfil. You respect a priest because he fulfils his mission, presenting food-offerings to God.”

Ok. That makes a little more sense.

8. Priests may not marry an immoral woman (who has had forbidden relations), nor a woman who (was born from a union which) violated the sacred character of the priesthood. Not May they marry a woman who is divorced from her husband., for each priest is holy to his God.

Now. I will say this. The Torah allows for divorce- and that is interesting to me. It just prevents divorce from connecting to holiness and righteousness as a priest.

9. If a priest wants to marry a divorcee; force him to be holy (see note above).
10. If a priests married daughter violates her sacred character through adultery, she violates the sacred character of her father. She should be burned in fire.

Ok. Stop here. I’ll confess. That’s hard for me to swallow.

Burning a daughter in fire because she committed adultery?

Ok. Here’s my thoughts. First. We are talking about the priesthood. So this was a specific family in the house of Israel. It was a small portion of the entire family of Israel. This was not the expectation of everyone.

The Torah is clear that adultery is bad. Cheating and breaking marriage vows is extremely problematic. It would seem in the priesthood, they are not “above the law” but they are held to a higher standard.

There is a leadership principle we can glean from all of this. How often in our society do we see our leaders think they are “above the law” meaning the laws don’t apply to them. The Torah is saying quite the opposite. Not only do the mitzvahs apply, they are applied with a higher standard than others.

I think we are going to see this further expanded as we close the portion today learning about the high priest:

For the high priest;

1. When the high priest is mourning, he should not leave his hair uncut for thirty days or tear his garments
2. He should not come under the same roof as any dead bodies
3. He should not make himself ritually impure to bury his father or his mother (if there are others who can tend to the matter)
4. He should not leave the sanctuary for the funeral of his parents. He can continue to carry out his service in the sanctuary.
5. Finally- he should marry a woman who is a virgin. He may not marry a widow, divorcee, a woman who was born from a Union which violated the sacred character of the priesthood, or an immoral woman.

Why? Because todays portion ends with this: “because I am God, who sanctifies him.”

I’m curious to what you all think! Leave a message in the comments!